The secrets

* The secrets in her melody   started: 01-01-2009/finished: 02-06-2009

 

=1=

   Dina Beth`man, clenched her arms tightly across herself using them as a shield from the icy sting of the winter morning. Her scarf wrapped high over her chin hiding her bluing lips and chattering teeth. Her quilted hat made her completely unrecognizable from anyone on this frosty morning except her husband and two children. They waved to her from the window of their house. Right on cue, she waved back to them as she latched the front gate, scurrying off to catch her train.

 

     All week long, she impatiently waited for Thursday to come. On Wednesday nights, her thoughts swirled in her head as her imagination tried to see into her tomorrow.

 

     For years, she had put herself second trying to be the best wife and mother. The stable home she carefully crafted for her family had become her prison. She hated herself for feeling this way but this wasn’t the only secrets she shamefully kept to herself.

 

     The station offered some relief from the frozen breeze that cut through her winter coat as if it were made of paper. Her train hadn’t backed into its assigned space beside the platform so she stayed inside waiting. A few eager souls had ventured out along the platform but it was probably from habit they braved the cold to be the first ones on the train when it stopped moving.

 

    The one thing Dina continued to do throughout the years was play her piano even in her prison. The notes on the pages were her only escape into a place where beautiful dancers gracefully floated, soaring through the heavens or prancing between the cardboard trees on the stage of the theater she had grown to love.

 

     Being with other people that hungered for music and shared the skills of a musician made her feel special again. That in itself would have been enough of a thrill to carry her through the week to Thursdays. Now she had a stronger reason she couldn’t wait to get to the concert hall for a day of practice.

 

     It was Danny. Where he sat, she could drift her eyes from the conductor to his beautiful face. Danny didn’t look like the stereotypical cellist. He looked more like one of the stagehands or a construction worker until he drew his bow. Only then was he exposed as an angel, complete with the soulful heart that could hear things in music that were held obscure to most.

 

     Dina was convinced Danny didn’t even know she was alive. In the warmth of the concert hall, she felt even smaller without the bulk of her large coat and the layers of sweaters. One day her world turned upside down and the mundane patterns of her life were shattered with a kiss.     

 

    During practice days, things could get hectic in the halls of the backstage areas. The Maestro may dismiss most of the orchestra for hours choosing to work with only a few to prefect a portion of a piece. The bustle of people and equipment would have given a traffic controller nightmares as people went out back for a smoke or mingled in the dressing rooms and many soundproof practice rooms.

 

     Dina was about to be crushed between two fast moving carts of equipment when Danny scooped her out of the way. A startled squeak jumped out of her as she found herself in the arms of her most delicious fantasy. Without a word spoken, he looked deep into her eyes and kissed her right on the lips. It happened so fast none of the other people noticed. When she blinked, he had set her feet gently back on the floor and disappeared.

 

     The excitement of the danger, the forbidden kiss and the surprise of Danny vanishing amplified in her as they all reached her heart at the same time. Shaken and dizzy she slid around the corner, a space between the wall and a pillar became her refuge while her memory tried to recreate the power in his arms and the heat of his lips.

 

     Her head swayed in a dream as Danny ravished her in her imagination. As if electricity passed through her she jolted back into reality, her eyes flashed open, and a cold shiver washed over her; she was enjoying the thoughts of another man’s kiss and yearning for more. A quick glance at her wedding ring and she knew her husband would see her shame. When he didn’t notice, she decided she wasn’t going to tell him about it or all the other kisses Danny gave her since then.

 

     Now that she took her seat on the train, she couldn’t wait to meet him for more. *

 

=2= She can’t stop this

 

     As Dina stared blankly out of the window, the train eased forward so smoothly it almost felt as if she remained steadfast, and the platform sneaked away. Trying to remember how she and Danny got tangled up in this situation became a pastime activity for her.

 

     The day of that first kiss still simmered in her mind. When the Master called everyone back to their seats, he scolded her for being late and missing the first prompt. Not only could she see the conductor glaring but she could also see Danny just beyond him begging her to look at him. With some difficulty, she pushed Danny out of her thoughts and focused on the baton.

 

After they were dismissed, she grabbed her stuff and ran to meet her train, not wanting or knowing how to face Danny.

 

     When she got home that night she was sure Richard could see it on her lips and would be furious. The bathroom mirror calmed her somewhat as there was no trace of lust on the outside. Yet her lips still stung and her smile made it worse.

 

“How was practice, darling?”

 

Dina glared at herself once more before turning off the light and returning to the bedroom.

 

“It was very busy, lots of things to remember.”

 

“Oh please, don’t start trying to explain that again. I don’t know how you musicians think. It’s all just dots and squiggly lines to me.”

 

    By the time she finished brushing her hair; Richard had already turned on his side and fallen asleep. Quietly, she turned out the lamp, and placed her brush back on the dressing table. This left nothing but the faint yellow light of the neighbor’s porch to seep through the curtains. That and the green glow of Richard’s clock shaped the room. Sitting on the edge of their bed, Dina pulled her feet up to keep her toes warm. Wrapping her arms around her knees wasn’t as comforting as she hoped it would be.

 

   She didn’t even want to lie down, what would be the point. Richard’s long breaths let her know he wasn’t going to be talking to her or doing anything else again tonight. The memory of Danny’s kisses made her shiver again. When was the last time Richard thrilled her this way? She couldn’t remember if good ole dependable Richard ever really moved her. He was early to bed, early to rise, and gone again. He reported to a job that she didn’t understand and kept him working late most nights. On Thursdays, he didn’t have to go in until after the girls were safely off to school.

 

     Janie and Pixie went to a private school that could be seen from the end of their street. Every morning she stood in the window watching them make their way to classes. Being a mommy felt good for years but now something was missing. As the girls got older, they didn’t depend on her as much as they use to. The youngest just discovered her friends were as close as the phone, so why bother talking to mom when her friends would giggle with her.

 

     Dina put her hand over her eyes worrying about her newest headache with her children. She could count the signs her oldest daughter was discovering boys were also on the other end of the phone.

This was the time when not only was a mom in the way but she was also a nuisance.

 

    Most of the time Dina found herself standing in the hall, on the other side of a locked door. Janie’s blaring music degraded every nerve and shredded every strand of patience a mother had. How could anyone consider that shit music, and how in god’s name could she talk to anyone on the phone with that crap shaking every wall in the house?

 

       They all probably enjoyed getting rid of her for the day unless their clothes weren’t clean, the pantry wasn’t full of food or the TV room wasn’t clean enough for them to destroy during a football game. Hell, with all this joy and satisfaction in her life, why would she hunger for the attentions of a sexy man that wanted her?

 

     That thought echoed in her head as she reached up and lightly touched her lips. Danny. When she closed her eyes, there he was. He was a man rippling with strength. Hot, inviting, wanting her and wanting her love. *

 

=3= Door to Ecstasy

 

The screeching of the wheels changing tracks made her thoughts fade for a moment. Dina bit her bottom lip reining in her smile. She closed her eyes remembering the day Danny finally got his chance to talk to her after that first kiss it was that next Thursday.

 

     He was already on the stage. Several of the other early arrivals tuned-up or milled around visiting. Danny had been waiting and watching, just as she walked through the door, he made sure they’re eyes met before he focused on his cello. The sound of the bow heavy on the strings made all others fall silent. Everyone could hear this was not adjustments or plucking, he was performing. Dina knew he was talking to her. The long deep notes were his pleas for her attention; the way his face grimiest told her, he desperately wanted to talk to her.

 

      Danny wanted to look at her but every eye in the house was on him, he had to keep this message a secret. Dina slipped out of her coat and sweaters, quietly sitting at her piano, with her hands in her lap. The cello sang its tale of sorrows to everyone else but to her it was a plea not to be angry with him.

 

     Danny lifted his eyes to the empty podium as if he were looking for the strike or snap of the master’s baton to change tempo. As he returned to his bow, he managed to steal a glance at Dina. The blush on her cheeks wasn’t from the cold; the way she held her head, and the sparkle in her eyes told Danny she wasn’t mad.

 

     Instantly the cello rejoiced. The song of new beginnings slowing to a graceful conclusion. Dina heard the message and its meaning was their secret. She slowly hid behind her piano as he stopped playing in case someone noticed the extra pink in her cheeks. The others applauded his passion but only Dina would find out how deep it ran.

 

     A slight jolt and the train pulled away from the next town, one more before her stop. Dina forced herself not to daydream so the train couldn’t carry her beyond her station.

 

     “Oh Danny, just a little longer, please be there, squeeze me again, kiss me, I’ve waited too long.”

 

     When they slowed at her stop, she sprang to her feet, checking for her purse, satchel of sheet music, and down the isle to the door. Why did it take so long to stop a train?

 

     Only two of the practice rooms had pianos in them, four and five. Danny told her to meet him in five. If they locked the room, someone might get suspicious if they didn’t they ran the risk of getting caught. It thrilled her to try and play a piece of music, while he touched her, holding the time without missing a note. Danny’s large hands pulling through her hair made her heart quicken wondering if he would finally adventure further where he dared not go the time before.

  The grand hall was only a short walk from the station but it always seemed too far.

 

“Calm yourself Dina, not so quick, you are here for the whole day, mustn’t look too eager. What if he isn’t here, what if he can’t come, that would be …he needs to be here, I need him here. I will have him for a whole hour before the maestro even gets to the building.”

 

     Dina pulled the door open; the smell of the concert hall reminded her of a cathedral. The chaotic sounds of a few instruments squabbling like siblings filled the large hall with life. The downward slope of the carpeted isles made her feel like she was getting smaller as she got closer to the stage.  

 

     Danny was waiting; he almost leaped with joy when he saw Dina. Casually he walked to the curtains on stage right. Dina stripped out of her coat and hat depositing them in the corner seat of the front row. When she got back stage, Danny was waiting by a door that was normally locked. Her heart fluttered, as she got closer to him. Cautiously she glanced around as he did; making sure no one was near.

 

      She almost choked when Danny produced a key and unlocked the door. He flicked a switch and a light at the bottom of a set of stairs blinked on,

 

Danny whispered, “Go on down, let me lock it.”

 

He met her at the bottom of the stairs. In an excited whisper she asked, “What is this?”

 

“It’s one of the prop rooms. No one comes down here”

 

     That’s all she needed to hear as she threw herself into his arms, oh Danny, I’ve missed you.”

 

Her feet dangled in mid air as he kissed her with the hunger of a starving man.

 

=4= Her Revealing Surprise

 

Over their heads, they could hear muffled conversations so they continued to speak in whispers. Danny found a couch from one of the plays, removed the covering so they could sit on one end.

 

      He sat first and Dina straddled his lap with her knees near his pockets. This put her at the perfect height. His eyes were the softest blue. She wore a frilly blouse with brightly colored flowers for him but it was still hiding under one of her sweaters.

 

“Help me with this; I want to show you something.”

 

     Ducking her chin inside the knitted collar, she lifted her arms surrendering her last winter wrap. Danny eagerly helped her, as it was hard enough to find her in all that wool. He needed to hold her impatiently. He still held tightly onto her sweater when it came free so it wouldn’t fall onto the dusty floor. It took them both only a second to realize her blouse had come off with the sweater and was still inside the bundle of wool.

 

     The surprise hit them both at the same time, neither of them planned to venture this far into their relationship until they knew one another better. At first, she tried to cover herself with one hand while making a lunge for the blouse with the other. Danny delighted with her surprise knowing instantly she never intended to let him see her this way

 

    Like any man, he wasn’t quite so willing to give up his prize now that he had it. Stretching his arm behind him forced Dina to lean closer trying to reach it.

 

Attempting to sound stern she quietly demanded, “Danny, give it back this instant”

 

    If her expression hadn’t contradicted her words, he might have averted his attention, gallantly returning her shirt. The twinkle in her eye and the way she posed told Danny he didn’t need to comply with any real haste.

 

     He bit her neck and she forgot what she was reaching for. He counted every loop of lace in the pretty bra tracing parts of it with his finger. She blushed but loved the sparkle it brought him. The puckering behind the thin vale of blue quickened his heart.

 

“Damn you’re beautiful Dina.”

 

     She wanted to hear him tell her this a thousand times. He set her sweater on her lap but trapped her arms behind her so she couldn’t touch it. Danny’s soothing gaze seemed to memorize every freckle on her pale skin then taste each one. She felt so pretty. His teeth playfully threatened to devour her.

 

“Danny you can’t leave any marks baby.”

 

    He pulled her close to him with the calm two lovers bask in when they have plenty of time. Dina turned to lie in his arms. Resting her head on his chest, she breathed in the faintest hint of Patchouli, this bolstered her visions of his prowess. His fingers continued to wonder as she cooed.

 

    Startled by the sudden sounds of bustling overhead, they knew their hour had quickly melted away. She stood before him and pulled her blouse out into the open where he could see it for the first time. Danny smiled as he stood, leaning close to whisper in her ear,

 

“I like the bra better, next time I’ll try to swipe it too.”

 

Her wink dared him to try and his nod told her it was as good as done and she might have a hard time reclaiming it.

 

     After she was dressed properly, he loosely tied that pesky sweater around her neck like a scarf letting it cape down her back. At the top of the stairs, they turned off the light and opened the door enough to peek out before joining the others. Dina slipped through the curtains near her piano and Danny went all the way around to the brass section mingling with the men before moving forward for his seat.

 

     The maestro hadn’t taken to the podium yet as he greeted everyone looking to see what he had to work with that day. Dina opened the key-cover on her piano, she hadn’t warmed up but with the conductor on the floor, she didn’t dare try. Instead, she flexed her hands and mimed a few cords hearing the notes in her head.

 

     Danny quickly prepared his bow and talked with the people around him, finding Dina as often as he dared. She teased him as she pretended to look over a piece of music. Her gestures made it look as if she were lost in thought, puckering her lips. She drummed the tip of her finger on them right where she wanted him to kiss her but never looked away from the paper. Batting her eyes as if she had no idea what she had been doing made him squirm behind his cello. *

 

=5= Refraining Measures  

 

     Once practice started, there wasn’t time to think about Danny except for the fact he was near and this always made her feel good. As the day ended, the conductor tapped the baton on his music stand once more,

 

“Next week I only want to see the Violins and the Horns for a split session. The rest of you take the day off but work on your assignments. We will all meet on the following Thursday so be ready to run through the entire program.”

 

     At first, Dina was upset. How could she go two whole weeks without seeing Danny? With pain in her eyes, she slowly looked up to find him smiling as he busied himself putting things away. His eyes were asking her something but she couldn’t understand what. With all the bustle and moving around on the stage he chanced mouthing something to her, knowing if he did it once no one would see him looking at her.

 

     Danny pointed to the floor, shook his head, mouthing the words, “Not here.”

 

Dina was about to confirm she knew they weren’t going to see each other for a long time but then he pointed to himself, glanced around the room then mouthed, “My house.”

 

     Even though she understood the words, it hadn’t sunk in yet and he was almost smiling about this horrible turn of events. Then she put it together, “Not here, my house.”

 

     The thrill that washed over her made her knees weak and she steadied herself on the piano. She had to turn away so no one could see how happy she was. Her hands were shaking, trying to gather her sheet music. Flashes of what they had done in the prop room sparkled in her. The wonder of having him all to herself for the entire day made her skin flush and hot.

 

     Danny winked at her and almost ran out the back door with his cello case. Her mind screamed, she needed to talk to him and he was leaving. She had so many questions, where, when, was he coming back. Closing her piano, she waited as long as she dared. Dina’s train wouldn’t wait for her so she had to go. The next one would be deep into the night and she couldn’t do that.

 

      She walked to the station with a heavy heart, as she was missing out on something wonderful. Her train was already slowing so she had to hurry.

 

     A car pulled into the parking lot and out stepped Danny. The sounds of a cry escaped her until she covered her mouth. Shaking her hands like she couldn’t get something off of them, she glanced at the train and then back to Danny. When she kept moving for the train Danny knew she didn’t have any time to waste. Taking her hand, they ran to the train.

 

     The porter waved for them to hurry. As Danny boarded behind her, he almost pushed her up the steps nipping the backs of her legs with playful pinches. The third compartment was empty. Dina threw her bags on the seat and leapt into his arms. Between kisses she asked,

 

“Where did you go? I thought you left.”

 

“Had to put my stuff in my car, I thought you were going to follow me out the side door. When you didn’t come, I drove around front to meet you. You were just about to the corner.”

 

     Danny stuffed the change from purchasing a ticket into his pocket as he quickly sat next to her. He looked like he was going to propose marriage by the way he took her hands in his.

 

“Next week would you spend the day with me?”

 

“YES”

 

“Excellent, I was afraid you would say no.”

 

“No way, it startled me when I saw your message then when you disappeared…”

 

     Danny told her he could ride with her for two more stops even though he needed to go the other way. He helped her program his number into her phone and told her to stay on the train until Darshan.

 

“I know that town, my sister lives in Piks.”

 

“If you get to Piks you missed your stop by one station, if that happens call me and I’ll come get you. Don’t try to go back.”

 

Dina was giddy, “I don’t know how I’m going to make it all the way to next week.”

 

     Danny almost crushed her as he showered her with kisses but all too soon, he was waving goodbye to her from the platform as she pressed herself to the window. *

 

=6=  Wistful Wonderings in Her Mind

 

     Dina felt a bubbling in her but knew the coming week would seem to take years to pass. Being alone with Danny, her Danny, all day, what would they do? Visions of what she hoped blinded into her sweet fantasies. If Danny pressed her, would she allow him things her husband didn’t seem to want anymore? Could she stop him from going too far, did she want to try? Richard had been the only man she had ever known, could she give herself to another? Before Danny, the answer would have been, never, but this man tore at the wall she built.

 

     Her parents insisted she marry Richard, this always seemed to make him resent her, she never really wanted to marry that young. Maybe this is why she let her daughters express themselves so boldly, to the point of being impudent. If she had her daughter’s grit when she was seventeen, maybe things would have been different.

 

     At thirty-four, she already had a seventeen-year-old girl that most mistook for her sister. Her thirteen-year-old still thought boys were gross little pigs and for that, she was thankful. Dina grinned remembering some of the things she said to keep that attitude strong in her little pixie. Children grow up much too fast these days, all too soon, they would find out fairytales were written to cover the pain of reality.

 

     As she stepped to the platform for the short walk home, a knot tightened in her stomach. Her girls were the only thing that made this bearable and soon they would fly away, what then, a life alone, in the house with Richard? Dina yearned for the comfort of her mother’s advice as she trudged home in the dark.

 

     Staring blankly at the mess Richard’s friends left for her in the kitchen and dining room, and there was no way she wanted to look into the den or living room. Dina removed her coat and sweaters, choosing to leave them in a pile on one of the kitchen chairs. She had to check on her babies.

 

      Opening the door to her little pixie’s room, she had fallen asleep while writing a secret note to her best friend asking if she liked someone named Josh. Dina would have gotten upset with the mention of boys in the note except the little yes-box and the no-box at the bottom let her know how much time she had before she needed to worry about this one too. Taking the pen, she laid it on the purple notebook and set them on the bedside stand. Pixie got a gentle kiss goodnight and a mother’s wish for sweet dreams.

 

     Janie’s door was locked as usual but Dina laid her forehead on the door wishing for a better relationship with her oldest daughter, listening to muffled songs and Janie quietly singing off key. Dina could picture her baby lying on her bed with her headphones on while she studied. The high marks Janie’s teachers gave her kept Dina from getting to upset about being shut out. Janie wanted to be self-sufficient and right now that meant mothers had to keep their distance. Dina also found out she wasn’t suppose to freak out about green hair and dog collars. She lightly touched her daughter’s door wishing it were Janie’s pretty face and whispered goodnight to her too.

 

      She could hear Richards drunken snoring even before she opened the door. The stench of rotten-egg-pizza-farts quickly drove her from the room. Turning on the bathroom fan and a lot of air sanitizer make it survivable but cleaning her kitchen seamed the better choice instead of going to bed.

 

     The window over her kitchen sink acted like a black mirror to show her glimpses of herself while Danny stood behind her in her imagination. She didn’t feel as guilty about her secret anymore swearing to support any woman that chose to run away for a while as she planned to do. She even laughed at the vision of being dragged back, kicking and screaming with a cannonball chained to her ankle.

 

     Letting Danny kiss her neck while she washed dishes, made it a pleasant task. He played with her hair and massaged her shoulders while pressing her tightly against the sink. All of a sudden, her imagination suggested something truly wicked.

 

     Looking out the window, she pictured her and Danny in his house with the night sky showing in through his windows.

Oh, wouldn’t that be a wonderful thing, but that would just be too impossible….

*

=7= Tormented By one’s Spouse

 

     The next morning Richard and the girls found her curled up in one of the chairs in the den. The spotless house didn’t go unnoticed and Janie came over and kissed her mom knowing how hard she must have worked. Richard looked around and left without even a word spoken to her.

     When Pixie needed help getting ready, Janie took care of her so Dina could rest.

 

“You stay there mom I can handle this for you.”

 

     Dina watched her daughters fix their own breakfast and lunches while Janie avoided arguments with her little sister. This made Dina feel wonderful. When Pixie went to brush her hair, Janie asked,

 

“Mom are you okay.”

 

“Yes baby, why do you ask?”

 

“Because you spent the night in that chair and dad didn’t say a word to you about the house or nothing.”

 

     Dina was proud her daughter noticed the clean house but embarrassed by what she saw between her father and mother or the lack of caring on his part. Maybe Janie was more grown up than even Dina realized. When Pixie came over for a kiss, Dina whispered,

 

“Don’t forget Amanda’s note about Josh.”

 

Pixie’s eyes lit up surprised her mother would know her secret even before she could tell. She patted her pocket,

 

“I have it right here.”

 

“Don’t get caught passing notes in class, do it before or after, so Mrs. Bragg won’t be mad.”

 

“I promise.”

 

     Janie waited by the door for her little sister and waved to her mom still holding onto her look of worry. Dina stayed in her chair just long enough for them to get to the gate then she stood by the window as her babies walked to school. Dina’s mood got darker with every step they took.

 

    Trying to brighten her mood, Dina flashed on Danny. I wonder what he is doing, is he thinking of me? Her phone made an odd chirping sound and she thought the battery was running low since she didn’t plug it in last night. She found one of those text messages waiting. When she opened it, a picture started loading. Who do I know that would send me pictures?

 

     It was a photo of a cello leaning on a piano. “Nelson’s for all your musical needs”

Dina giggled; Danny had managed to send her a message that wouldn’t mean a thing to anyone but her.

She had to tease him for this, “do-you-give-lessons?”

 

A moment later, “we do, appointment needed.”

 

      Dina enjoyed her morning exchanging texts with Danny. Since he owned a music store, he could play around waiting for customers. When he found out no one else could see what he wrote, the innuendos swept into a bluer nature, this delighted Her and she enjoyed telling him what a bad-man he was but capped her scolding with plenty of X’s and O’s.

 

     Once Danny had to go, she still wanted to talk to someone so she called her sister.

 

  “What’s wrong, are you okay?”

 

“Yes, I just wanted to say hi, is that a crime”

 

“No, guess not, I thought that jerk finally went off the deep end”

 

Dina and Zell had a good conversation. Dina didn’t tell her about Danny even though she could have. Zell wondered why Dina was so happy all of a sudden but Dina held her secret.

 

      Dina got around to asking her big sister if she wanted company Wednesday night, knowing she could get to Danny sooner on Thursday if she started from her sisters house. Zell had plenty of room and nothing planned so she told her to come home as quick as she could make it.

 

     Dina floated through her house like one of the ballerinas she loved to watch. Doing laundry wasn’t a drudgery, and cleaning change out of Richards’s pockets was like being paid for washing his clothes. Two dollars, some candy papers and one of Richard’s business cards. Glancing at both sides of it, there was a phone number on the back written in a woman’s handwriting.

 

     Dina stared at the number for a minute with an evil grin, “Why the hell not, let’s give it a try.”

 

    Chuckling to herself, she wondered if this was why Richard never had time for her anymore. Her heart beat faster as she used the house phone and dialed the number. She thought about scaring the woman but then changed her mind and thought about thanking her for keeping him occupied.

 

     The phone rang twice and some one answered but before Dina could say anything the voice on the other end spoke first,

 

“Hold on, I’ll get her….Sherry it’s for you.” – “Who is it?” – “It’s your Ducky”

 

     Dina almost pranced in a circle and invented a new happy-dance until Sherry got on the phone. They ended up having a pleasant little conversation, it was short and Sherry stuttered quite a bit but it was pleasant nonetheless.

 

     Dina leaped with joy after hanging up the phone. Every speck of guilt wash out of her for kissing Danny. Part of her wanted to be angry with him but how could she be mad at him for doing the same thing she planned. Well she hadn’t decided just how far she was going to let Danny go until she talked to Sherry.

 

     Checking her watch, she counted the hours she had left before Richard got home. Dina might have been just as guilty as he was but she could still have a little fun tormenting him. *

 

=8= Let the Trade-Winds Blow

 

     Dina gathered all of Richards shaving gear from the master-bath and moved them to the common bathroom down the hall. She filled a cardboard box with his clean socks shirts and underwear. Grabbing three or four of his suits, she hung them in the coat-closet by the front door. A quick trip to the linen closet produced a stack of sheets and a few blankets. She neatly stacked them on the couch in the den. Snickering to herself, she remembered Richard’s comments about needing a longer couch in there so he could fully relax while watching one of his games on TV.

 

     Standing in the middle of their master bedroom, she turned in a slow circle looking for something else he might need, what was she forgetting? Dina’s eyes lit up when she spotted that annoying clock on his side of the bed. Just before she unplugged it she noted the time, the girls would be home soon. She neatly set the clock on the stack of blankets in the den next to his pillow and slid the double doors closed to separate it from the dining room.

 

     She ran to the kitchen to start dinner.  Knowing it would be cold by the time Richard made it home; there was no need for her daughters to eat a cold supper. Fixing his favorites and setting the table with her bet dishes would help to grind in his guilt. Bringing out the candles, set the stage to perfection. She remembered the business card with Sherry’s number on it. Dina slipped it under his napkin knowing he wouldn’t say a word about it.

 

     She carefully looked through her selection of kitchen knives and chose the longest chef knife she owned. Placing it on the table next to her plate would send the message she was about to go psycho on him. She never intended to use it but it made a good prop for the little play. Throwing a napkin over it would hide it from Janie and Pixie until after they left the table.

 

“Mom we’re home.”

 

     Dina took the time to listen to Pixie’s adventures and get caught up on any news about the school or teachers meetings. Janie waited for her sister to finish one of her excited stories while she silently looked around. They rarely ate from mom’s finest china and her mother almost bubbled with excitement while listening to her little sister. The doors to the den were never closed so that added to her curiosity.

 

     While Dina’s attention was required at the stove, Janie slid open one of the doors to the den before her mother could ask her to stay out of there.

 

     Pixie ran off to call Amanda and Dina turned around just in time to see Janie’s shadow disappearing into the den. A moment later Janie came back,

 

“Mom what’s going on, why is Dad going to be sleeping in there?”

 

   Dina hadn’t planned to tell her daughter, who was too damn smart for her own good, what was happening between her and her father. Keeping her back turned to Janie only delayed some kind of explanation for another minute but Dina used that time in a panic to find something ambiguous she could offer without coming right out and telling her to stay out of this.

 

“Well sweetie…ahhh…you might notice…a few changes around here in the next few days.”

 

Janie knew her father well enough to know this wasn’t going to be a quiet argument. With typical teenage sarcasm she pressed her mother for more information,

 

“Duh, Don’t-You-think….I might notice a tiny little thing like this too?”

 

“Baby your father and I….haven’t been getting along very well lately.”

 

“LATELY, Try Years. Oh you guys don’t yell but its plain you haven’t been happy in a, l-o-n-g time, except now. What’s up with that?”

 

“Janie people change, and its not always the best kind of changes you might hope for.”

 

“So you’re finally kicking Dad out?”

 

“No” Dina paused as the words caught in her throat, “Not exactly, but he might be spending more time in the den.”

 

     Janie hugged her mom knowing she was in for a rough time as soon as her father got home. Heading for her room she decided to show her mother a little more support with one more snide comment over her shoulder as she left,

 

“It’s about Fricken-Time”

 

“Janie Beth`man, you watch your mouth.”

 

Dina had to scold her but secretly she was glad Janie wasn’t going to give her a hassle about this. Now all she had to do was act like her daughter while she informed her cheating husband of the new sleeping arraignments. *

 

* The secrets in her melody (part II)  

 

=9= Thumbscrew Showdown

 

     Dina felt the thump of a closing car door just outside of the house, seven-thirty right on the dot. Richard was always two and a half hours late getting home. She put his plate in the microwave and it was ready to eat before he opened the door. She waited to eat with him while the girls played in their rooms.

 

     Normally she asked him about his day but when he walked through the door, she said nothing. Dina wasn’t even going to make eye contact with him until he started to complain about not getting a proper greeting. The look she shot at him would have killed a smaller man.

 

     When Richard shut his mouth immediately this told Dina he had already talked to Sherry before coming home. Hell she knew that would have accounted for his missing two hours. Setting his briefcase by the door, he quietly sat at the table. Dina was seated on his right. Richard stared at the china not knowing what to say or how to get out of trouble. Dina decided to start things off by placing her napkin in her lap. Richard’s eyes locked onto the chef knife she placed next to her plate instead of a butter knife.

 

     She paused as if she wasn’t allowed to take the next step in her game until he put his napkin in his lap. There was the card with the phone number on it and Dina didn’t move a muscle. Richard was almost afraid to look at her with her hand resting so lightly on the knife. They probably would have stayed frozen that way all night until Dina broke the silence,

 

“So how is Sherry today; did she get her shopping done?”

 

     Richard swallowed hard and Dina had plenty of practice reading his body language. Since he chose not to add to the conversation, Dina started the speech she carefully rehearsed,

 

“I realize how hard you have been working lately trying to put food on the table for you’re children. Making a good showing for your boss and helping Sherry with her exercise program leaves you exhausted.

     Since that hasn’t left you with much time for me or sports, I’ve decided you deserve to relax and catch up on all the games you’ve missed. From now on the den is all yours. Watch what you want all night. I moved your clock in there so you won’t be late for work in the morning and a pillow. Your suits are in that closet and you can shave in the children’s bathroom.

     Since I’ve given you the den, I thought it was only fair that I should get the bedroom. The door will be locked and I don’t want to be disturbed in the mornings. Let’s see, did I forget anything, oh yes, I’ll be visiting my sister Wednesday, spending the night with her so tell Sherry you’ll need a rain check. Lock the doors and tomorrow is trash day, good night.”

 

     Dina pushed the bedroom door closed a little harder so it would echo into the dinning room then spun the latch hard hoping it too might add to her dramatic exit. She waited for the shock to wear off figuring he would be pounding on the door any minute wanting to talk about their new arrangement. Five minutes, ten, still nothing.

 

     She put clean sheets on the bed then dove face down into the middle of it before turning over. Making snow angels on the king-size bed seemed more rewarding since she didn’t get cold and wet in the process. Reaching for her cell phone, she had to call her sister to tell her the news.

 

     From the sounds of it, Zell started celebrating immediately. She still didn’t tell her about Danny not wanting to chance loosing her newfound power if someone overheard.

 

“I gotta go tuck the girls in but I will see you Wednesday-noon-ish. I have more to tell you but it will have to wait.”

 

     When she stepped into the hall, Janie had her door open a little waiting to see if her mom would come out. Dina sat on the foot of Janie’s bed and her daughter quickly scrunched over where she could hold her mothers hand and whisper to her.

 

“Dad’s got a girlfriend doesn’t he?”

 

“Did he tell you that?”

 

“No you said it, Sherry, Cherry, something like that”

 

“You brat, you weren’t suppose to be listening.”

 

“Yeah, well, you kicked his ass.”

 

Dina was proud of herself for finally standing up to him but wondered, “Did he leave?”

 

“No he’s in the den….no TV, just sitting, I think he’s waiting for you to go talk to him Mom.”

 

“Can you get your own dinner a couple nights next week and feed Pixie? I’m going to see your aunt Zell for a while.”

 

“Sure, because of Dad?”

 

“No, but you’re in charge, he’ll be here if you need anything but plan on fixing your own supper. I had better go see if he wants to talk.” *

 

=10= Dina’s Thoughtful Music

 

    Dina stepped to the den. Richard sat in the dimly lit room, staring at the floor. When he saw the silhouette of his wife barely shadow the doorway he looked up for a moment. The light behind her clearly showed the guilt on his face so he averted his eyes. Dina knew their marriage was over, in some ways it had died years ago. They only went through the motions as a couple. Their children had been their only motivation. The next step they took would have a lasting affect on their girls. Dina finally broke the silence,

 

“Janie is a senior this year, the last thing she needs right now is her parents cutting up her home or fights between then.”

 

Richard looked at her, this showed he agreed and urged her to continue her thoughts by slowly nodding.

 

“We’ve come this far, we can hold on a little longer. She will be going off to college soon then we can decide what other changes need to take place. Until that day comes, I will cook and clean doing my part as housekeeper and mother. You do your part as provider and protector. If you aren’t coming home for the evening, I think you should call but they shouldn’t see any more changes between us until then.”

 

Richard saw the logic in this arrangement, “I agree”

Dina quietly slipped away.

 

     The next morning she woke with a freshness that tingled. Last night she unofficially ended her marriage and should fell rotten but she couldn’t feel anything but happy. The girls didn’t have school so Dina let them sleep in. With a dust cloth in hand, she danced her way to her piano and sat on the bench for a moment.

 

  Dina’s mind opened up to songs she hadn’t played in years. She didn’t need to read the sheet music. She didn’t really need to think about the songs at all. Her fingers played as if they remembered. Her face mocked the dramatic parts and closing her eyes, she could see the hands of the conductor.

 

     His graceful gestures added the other sounds in her mind. Every time the French horns sounded, dancing, kings or queens took the stage. The trumpets heralded iron decrees and the flutes brought out woodland creatures to witness the first glance of the fair maiden to the gallant knight. The violins became their promises while the harp sprinkled fairy dust in their hair. Kettledrums were with the force that stole the maiden from the knight. The violas and violins were the echoes of her words to him and the Cellos begged the Gods to take mercy on him. The whole time the piano followed the story in the trickling waters, the laughter and the tears.

 

     As the lights faded, everyone and everything vanished into the black. Danny’s cello brought a single light to the center of the stage where he waited as the knight. Stripped of his armor he pined for the maiden in the silver glow. The piano carried Dina to him like a coach. She danced in the arms of her lover, her Pointe shoes lifting her to warmth of his lips. The next thing she knew her piano had fallen silent, her hands waited for Dina to see their stillness had brought her home and back to reality. Dina patted her piano as if it were her friend, promising she would return after she completed her work.

 

     When the phone rang her first thought was, “Danny” but then she realized it was the house phone. She almost sounded disappointed when she heard her sister’s voice.

 

“Well hello to you too, I wanted to see if you survived the night.”

 

“It wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be.”

 

“Come on don’t leave me hanging, spill, you gotta tell me everything.”

 

Zell never did like Richard so she made sure Dina knew her door was always open.

 

    The next few days were painfully slow. She would have thought time almost stopped if it weren’t for Janie and Pixie. A trip to the movies, lunch in the food court at the mall and some serious shopping netted quite a few treasures. Some of the things Dina bought she made sure her daughters were off doing something else when she picked them out. She would need to lock her door before trying them on in front of the mirror. *

 

=11= What am I Forgetting?

 

     Dina went over her plans with Janie a half ah dozen times making sure the list of phone numbers could easily be found tacked to the refrigerator. The spare house key was in the plastic rock in the flowerbed. She was sure she was forgetting something. Janie brought her music satchel,

 

“Here mom you forgot this.”

 

That wasn’t what she forgot but now that was one more thing she had to carry when she got on the train the next day.

 

“Settle down mom its just one night I can handle it, don’t you trust me?”

 

“It’s not that baby. I do trust you, I just…”

 

“Look even if Dad doesn’t come home tomorrow we’ll be fine I’m almost eighteen, we could do with out him for a week.”

 

“Don’t say that sweetie.”

 

“Yeah well where is he now?”

 

“He, ah, had, a meeting he had to attend, he’ll be here after you girls are asleep…. Then he’ll probably be gone before you get up in the morning.”

 

“Mom you suck at lying, he’s spending the night at Cherry’s house.”

 

“You mean Sherry”

 

“Whatever”

 

Janie kissed her and headed for her room.

 

“You’re wrong honey he’ll be home, you’ll see, good night.”

 

“Yeah sure, you’re gonna grow sores on your tongue too, does that sound familiar?”

 

Dina wasn’t going to tell Janie her father was spending the night with Sherry but it was getting harder keeping her in the dark on most things. She went ahead and locked all the doors including the chain-lock on the door.

As she passed Janie’s room she heard, “Oh he’ll be here.”

 

“Go to sleep smart-ass.”

 

“Yes-Mommy”

 

     Dina closed her door but didn’t need to lock it that night. She enjoyed a long hot bath, thinking about Danny. They got the chance to talk on the phone more lately; she even talked with him a few times while in bed. When Danny found out, she was going to her sister’s house Wednesday he wanted to take her to dinner. Dina objected of course, having a good since of social graces. Danny asked her to bring Zell with her. He would do anything to be able to spend a few more hours with her.

 

    Zell was willing to go to dinner with a few of her friends from the orchestra so it was a dinner-date so to speak. The others that were going to meet them would mysteriously develop a headache leaving just the three of them. This way Zell could meet Danny before Dina told her who he was. The words, “He’s my boyfriend,” sounded so strange to her but they also made her feel all gooey inside.

 

      After her bath, Dina stared at the ceiling from her bed. Wrapped tightly in terrycloth, she lay there nervously waggling her feet for over an hour. Finally, she jumped up and went back into her bathroom. Sitting on a towel near the heater, she painted her nails. As soon as her toes were done, her feet went back to waggling. She blew on them lightly, moving her hands so she could see them from different angles trying to imagine what Danny would think of them.

 

      Wednesday morning her eyes flashed open and she flew out of bed only to find there was nothing for her to do. Her over-night bag had been packed and repacked more times than she could remember. She took the sheet music out of her satchel and hid some things in it for Danny’s eyes only, perfume, deodorant, brush, coat; the list went on and on but everything was accounted for.

 

     It was too early to fix the girl’s breakfast and there was no way she could get back to sleep. Even after the girls got up when Dina didn’t have anything to do she checked to make sure her outfit was laid out on her bed waiting for the girls to make it to school.

 

     Her dress showed enough shoulder to be sexy and still be considered in good taste. The high-cut waist with loose pleading made her legs look longer than they really were. The slanted hemline showed one knee, the slight flower pattern made her bust look a little larger. The handbag would give her shaking hands something to hold onto, and the shoes, oh my god they were perfect. Now all she had to do was stay totally clean until Danny saw her. At the last minute, she decided to wear jeans and tennis shoes on the train.

 

     She slowed down before the girls got up and being mom again calmed her somewhat.

As they kissed Dina goodbye heading off to school. There was still something she was forgetting. After little Pixie went outside Janie kissed her mom and whispered,

 

“Don’t forget the condoms Mom.” *

 

=12= Complete picture of doubt 

 

Dina’s embarrassment was three fold and complete when Janie closed the gate and playfully shook her finger at her mother and winked. She had been so transparent her teenage daughter knew what she was planning, scolded her and she did forget the protection; hell, it had been too long since she had dated anyone.

 

     She hated asking for them at the store, why did they need to put them behind the clerk, thankfully, there wasn’t a line of people. She rolled her eyes thinking about it, “Yes little freckle-face boy behind the counter I’m gonna go get some and he’s this big, God how humiliating.” How was she supposed to know what size to buy, and what the hell was a rib?

 

     Buying a pretty bra for Danny to steal had been a fun joke in her mind. The matching panties were a bonus. The baby-doll lingerie, although it was a little more risqué still only made her think of being involved in some heavy petting. Hundreds of kisses, hugging and risky touching from him had delighted her thoughts for countless hours. Beyond that, she never really looked at the images of what would come next. Buying contraceptives made her focus on exactly what she was in for at Danny’s house, “Holy shit, now what am I going to do?”

 

     Part of her knew what would be happening but actually visualizing it gave her pause. Not that she was against it by any means but would she be good enough for him and his expectations?

 

     Dina tried to put it out of her mind but the harder she tried, the more she thought about it. When the train snuck past the concert hall, she was ready to cry. Glancing at her watch out of habit, the evil twin in her imagination had her convinced Danny would hate her. He would be so frustrated with how little she knew he probably wouldn’t want to see her anymore, ever.

 

     As the train slowed at her stop, she meekly gathered her things. While everyone else walked with a purpose after disembarking from the train, Dina barely moved. All of her excitement had turned to fear and now she felt so hollow. The cold she shivered from now was coming from inside her. Every time her heart beat it made her whole body ache.

 

     Dina spotted the taxis and headed that way, she felt sick to her stomach.

 

“Dina, Dina wait.”

 

Who was calling her? Turning to find where that voice came from she saw Danny. At the same time she recognized him, he saw the pain in her eyes.

 

“Oh, Baby what’s wrong?” the smile that had been on his face melted. Dina dropped her bags on the concrete when Danny scooped her into his arms. The joy he had a moment ago when he finally saw her quickly turned to concern, wondering if she was hurt.

 

     Every time she tried to think, he kissed her. Her arms were around his neck and her feet dangled when he stood tall. His kisses found her cheeks and she knew he would run from her. More kisses found her nose, forehead and finally her lip. The thrill of being held and kissed by him brought a nervous laugh that had tears choking her at the same time.

 

     He picked up her bags and led her to his car. Dina walked with the confusion of someone that just woke from a deep sleep. She still didn’t know why Danny was there. They weren’t supposed to meet until that night for dinner. Leaning on his car kept her from falling over. She was delighted he had come for her. Their hunger for each other was only held in check by the fact they were in public.

 

     They finally made it into his car but kissing Danny was definitely more important than getting to Zell’s house.

 

     He still didn’t know why she had been ghostly white, and ready to cry when he found her. There was still shadows of the gloom on her face,

 

“Are you having second thoughts about coming sweetie?”

 

“No but…” his beautiful blue eyes stole her words, the heat of his lips fogged her vision and his hands in her hair made her dizzy.

 

     He didn’t like the word, ‘but.’

 

Dina closed her eyes for a second so she couldn’t see him and put her fingers on his lips because they confused her.

 

“I need to talk to you”

 

When Danny heard those words his blood ran cold, “Baby don’t say that, I need you so bad.”

 

Now Dina was confused with the sad look on Danny’s face because she didn’t know telling a man that was in love, we need to talk, meant the death of the relationship.

 

“Are you calling us quits before we even get started?”

 

“Heavens no, what ever gave you that idea?”

 

“Maybe you better tell me what’s on your mind before I die of heart failure.”

 

     Dina stammered, stuttered and said a lot of things that had nothing to do with what she wanted to say. She finally managed to let him know that even though she had been married for almost seventeen years she didn’t know very much about some things. Danny was blankly looking at her waiting for her next statement of what things she didn’t know when it finally hit him what she meant.

 

     Taking her into his arms, he breathed a sigh of relief, kissing his beautiful woman,

 

“Darling we’ll learn thing together then.”

 

When Dina heard him say that, every muscle in her body relaxed. When Danny stopped to put gasoline in the car she rolled down the window so she could watch him. The cool air refreshed her cheeks giving her a needed boost. She still felt vulnerable but in his arms she didn’t care what he did to her just as long as he never stopped. *

 

=13= Reflections of an Imposing Truth

 

     Danny pulled back onto the road, kissed Dina again before they got up to speed before traffic forced him to watch the road instead of her legs.

 

“I knew where the train station was but the directions to your sister’s house were a little confusing.”

 

“You surprised me showing up the way you did but if you hadn’t, I probably would have been on the next train home.”

 

“We couldn’t have that now could we. Are you sorry you decided to stay?”

 

“No as long as you don’t tease me about why I was going to change my mind.”

 

“Don’t worry; I’ll be teasing you everywhere else”

 

“Oh you nasty man keep your eyes on the road.”

 

   When they made it to Zell’s house Danny stayed just long enough for introductions. He helped Dina carry her things into the house and agreed to pick them up by eight o’clock. When Dina walked him back out to his car she kept her distance from him biting her lip. Danny understood she hadn’t told Zell who he was so it didn’t bother him. She managed an accidental brush of their hands before he closed his door. Danny winked as he drove off.

 

 

     Dina waited until she couldn’t see his car anymore then turned to head in to see her sister. Zell was leaning against the doorway with her arms crossed. She held the tip of her tongue between her teeth, with an extremely large grin on her face.

 

“So who’s the hunk, and don’t give me any shit, if you could see your face about now, I know he ain’t just a friend in that band.”

 

“It’s an orchestra and Danny plays the cello.”

 

“Yeah and your butt too when no one is watchin.”

 

     Dina turned bright red as her sister hugged her, closing the door behind them. Zell fixed them both a hot cup of tea then sat sideways on the couch facing Dina as she filled in most of the details.

 

“I’m crushed, you didn’t come to see me, and I’m just your alibi you sneaky bitch.”

 

“Not entirely but, yeah kinda”

 

     Zell giggled and kicked her feet on the cushions when she found out there really wasn’t any practice session for Dina at the concert hall the next day.

 

“So tomorrow will be you two’s first time alone together, at his house, all day, with out any interruptions what so ever?”

 

“Yup”

 

“You lucky little-shit and all this time he has been hiding in the music store just a few miles from here.”

 

“Don’t even go there, he’s mine and you keep your hands off.”

 

     The two sisters talked all day teasing each other as they did when they were little. When it was time to get ready, Dina was an hour into her preparations. She had already put on her strapless bra, matching panties, nylons and high heels. She paced back and forth from the bathroom to her sisters bedroom where Zell sat on the bed listening. Dina had stepped back into the bathroom to use the brightly lit mirror for her makeup when Zell looked into the satchel. She Held up the pretty little baby-doll nightie Dina thought she had hidden,

 

“Let me guess Danny’s favorite color is blue?”

 

“How did you know that?”

 

“Just a wild assumption on my part.”

 

     Dina stopped dead in her tracks when she saw Zell holding the little silky. Zell’s mind started working out a few more things her little sister hadn’t planned. Dina lost her train of thought for a moment as Zell casually slipped it back into the satchel and zipped it closed. To steer the conversation away from what Zell had seen Dina asked,

 

“Aren’t you gonna get ready, he’ll be here any moment.”

 

Zell smiled when Dina finally slipped her dress on straightening the seam line.

 

“I’ve decided I’m gonna sit this one out.”

 

    Dina started to object but Zell pointed her finger at her like their mother use to when she didn’t want any back-talk. The doorbell rang and Zell jumped up to go open the door.

 

    Danny was dressed very eloquently holding two orchids, one was a peach color the other a bluish-red. He was very polite not mentioning he noticed Zell wasn’t ready and stood in the vestibule. He tried to offer Zell the blue flower. When she kissed him on the cheek greeting him into her home, she swiped the peach flower. Zell graciously excused herself running off to find Dina,

 

“Gawd that man is gorgeous; I almost bit him when I kissed him.”

 

“You what?”

 

“Oh, stop, I was just welcoming him.”

 

   Dina looked at herself in the mirror again, fluttering her hands with nervous excitement. Zell went to her dresser and found a small hair-stay with long tines. She wedged the orchid in it and cut the stem short. She managed to get Dina to stand still long enough to put the flower in her hair; standing back they both looked at Dina in the mirror.

 

“Sweetie he’s gonna love it.” Zell handed Dina her clutch-purse before they went to meet Danny. *

 

=14= Peerless Date Knight

 

     Only a few minutes passed but to Danny it felt like hours as he wondered into the living room. Behind him, he heard the gentle tapping of Dina’s heels on the stone tiles. He froze when he saw her standing there. His eyes were telling her how beautiful she was but his throat went dry. Dina saw his sparkle and held her hands out to her side striking a pose for him. They both stopped just beyond the others reach; Danny caught himself before he kissed her but managed to tell her how beautiful she looked.

 

     They were both enjoying how nice the other one looked when Zell impatiently took Dina by the shoulders bringing her directly to Danny. He humbly offered Dina the other orchid. Zell took it before she could touch it,

 

“No way cowboy, this one’s mine, go on, kiss her for crying out loud, can’t you see she’s dieing for it.”

 

      This was what they needed to break the tension. When Zell made it clear, she knew they were a couple; he kissed Dina the way he wanted. By the time their kiss ended, they had forgotten about Zell standing right beside them until she broke the silence,

 

“So what’s for dinner, where are you taking her? Oh, while we’re on the subject, just what time are you planning to have her home, Mister, I-want-to-drowned-in-your-blue-eyes.”

 

     That did it the quiet trance was broken, the giggles and snickers crept upon all three of them. Danny was amused how straight forward Zell was and how it embarrassed Dina. Zell started to push them toward the front door when Danny gently stopped her,

 

“Dina it’s cold out there sweetie…you’re gonna need your coat.”

 

“You two lovebirds stay here and don’t mess up my rugs I’ll get her coat.”

 

   No sooner was Zell out of the room when Danny bent forward to steal a kiss. Somewhere down the hall they heard,

 

“Mind those hands.”

 

Dina’s giggling messed up their kiss but they tried anyway.

 

     Danny helped her into her coat when Zell came back then she followed them out to his car. Once Dina was safely in, Zell handed him the satchel and told him to put it in his trunk but not to tell Dina until they discussed when he should bring her home. As they were pulling out of the driveway, Zell held her hand up to her ear miming, ‘Call me later’ as Dina nodded.

 

      On the way to the restaurant, talking about how crazy her sister was helped to relax them both, and entertained Danny, he loved to hear her talk.

 

   With Dina wearing a chiffon dress on such a cold night, Danny didn’t waste any time getting her inside where it was warm. He made her blush when he offered to warm her legs in the restaurant. She made him blush when she placed his hand on her cold knees under the tablecloth.

 

     Neither of them was very interested in eating. Being totally consumed by the other one. They picked at their food anyway, politely sipping their wine. Danny believed she was the most beautiful girl in the world and felt like a king because she wanted to be with him. His eyes were doing things to her she had never felt in her life. Holding his hand in the open made her feel wonderful, she felt she belonged to him and it was plan to everyone she held his heart in her hands.

 

     Garcon cleared the dinner plates being as unobtrusive as could be expected. Danny ordered her an elegant dessert, just so he could look at her a while longer in that light. She gladly shared with him thinking how sexy it felt to feed him with her fork while he volunteered to dab the corners of her mouth with a clean napkin, which he exercised a few times even though she knew it wasn’t necessary.

 

    They invented a game called ‘what-would-we-do-if-it-were-warm-outside-tonight.’

Walking barefoot in the park seemed to top the list for both of them until Danny said,

 

“Or we could go to my place, drink some wine by the fire.”

 

“Would it need to be warm outside?”

 

“With you darling, any night would be perfect.”

 

      Dina lightly bit her bottom lip showing a hint of her wanton grin. After they left the restaurant, Dina called her sister to let her know she wouldn’t be home for a while longer. Danny only heard one side of their conversation but it was fairly clear what was being said, knowing what kind of a joker Zell was. Dina closed her phone and put it back in her purse.

 

“Zell said she gave you a bag for me.”

 

“That’s right, but we didn’t talk about you going home yet so I wasn’t supposed to bring it up.”

 

“After you see what’s inside you might be glad she mentioned it.”

 

“Oh really, if I like it too much I might try and keep you all night.”

 

Danny waited for Dina to object or tease him for playing the roll of shameless cad. She started to say something but when he winked, she unlatched her purse again,

 

“I’d better call Zell and tell her not to wait up for me tonight.”

 

“Tell her goodnight and I promise to keep you safe.” *

 

=15= A Fire for Cold Feet

 

     Dina trembled not knowing how long they would be driving to get to Danny’s house. Her stomach started to tighten and her hands started to tremble. It quickly moved through her knees, she shivered as if she were cold even though Danny had the heater on and his car was toasty warm.

 

     He reached to the visor and pressed a button on the garage door opener. His garage was immaculate. Dina let her eyes dance over everything as if it would tell her something about him she didn’t know. She had to admit there was quite a bit she still didn’t know. That little voice that spreads doubt started chattering telling her she might have made a mistake trusting him enough to go home with him.

 

     The door started closing before he even got out to open her door. The look on his face told her he was proud of his home and couldn’t wait to get her inside. Danny reached for her hand like the gentleman he was. The moment Dina took his hand it was clear to both of them how much she was actually shaking.

 

“Are you okay sweetie?”

 

She knew being candid with him was the best course of action. Whispering as if someone else might overhear her.

 

“I’m a little nervous.”

 

     The woeful look on her face let him know she wasn’t just nervous, she was down right scared. Tenderly he took her into his arms. She needed that kind of understanding and clung to him. It felt odd to her, not only was Danny the source of her fear but the comfort she needed all rolled into one.

 

     To his credit, Danny held still not pushing, urging until she was calm enough to decide if she wanted to stay. After a few moments Danny whispered,

 

“Do you want to have a look inside before you decide whether you want me to take you home or…?”

 

    This made her feel a little less vulnerable knowing she could put a stop to her visit any time she wanted.

 

“I know I’m being silly, is it warmer inside?”

 

“Yes and remember that fire I promised you, I can have it going in flash.”

 

“Lead the way fine Sir.”

 

      Danny took her by the hand and by putting his arm behind his back; he was able to walk in just ahead of Dina. Just inside Danny slipped off his shoes sliding them under a bench that also had some slippers and running shoes under it. Dina quickly deduced she should do the same. When she sat on the bench, Danny knelt in front of her and gently unbuckled her ankle straps. Taking his time, he looking into her eyes as he enjoyed his work. His strong hands on her ankles felt nice, her smile and the way she pressed her lips into a tight line let him know she enjoyed his work too.

 

“Come with me my dear, let me show you where I get away from it all.”

 

     Danny started turning on some of the lights as they stepped down into his living room. His tastes tended to lean toward the Orient with a Polynesian flair. The fireplace was the center feature of the main house that for the most part was one large room with several levels with decretive railings,

 

“Oh Danny, it’s beautiful, how, I mean, this is you?”

 

“My father helped me build it, he spent most of his life overseas and when he retired he helped me design it.”

 

     Memorized by the look of everything she forgot about being nervous. Danny started the fire and they joke about how much easier a gas fire was than wooden logs. Dina took a seat at the counter that made the open kitchen look like a theater, while he chose a bottle of wine. She found out Danny was quite the chef and loved to cook extravagant dinners. He opened the wine retrieving two crystal flutes, setting them on the counter next to the cork.

 

“May I show you the rest of the place while we let it breathe?”

 

He proudly gave her what he called the grand tour. At one end of the house, there was a room with only a single chair and his music stand in the center. One side of the room had a sliding glass wall that overlooked a private garden that could only be seen from that room.

 

“This is where I play, and….think of you.”

 

“Now you’re trying to get on my good side with that silver tongue of yours”

 

“Is it working?”

 

“I’m not prepared to say just yet but don’t stop.”

 

     They went back for their glass of wine and Danny assured her, his house made him appear wealthier than he actually was. At first, she didn’t believe him but he reminded her he had never been married spending countless hours with his cello.

 

“What about the ladies, you must have them stashed everywhere?”

 

At first Danny joked, “Dozens of them constantly.”

 

His wink and the way his tone darkened slightly let her know this was a lie.

 

 “No the truth is, there has only been a few, they seem to think they are competing with Rachel.”

 

“Who is Rachel?”

 

“You met her, she’s my cello.”

 

Dina choked back a giggle, her glass had been in front of her chin while she listened but she lowered it with surprise. “Wait, you…named…your cello?”

 

Danny feinted a look of shame, “A little weird huh?”

 

Dina openly laughed, “No I think it’s cute, why not, guys name their cars.”

 

“Good point I’ve got to add that one to my list.”

 

“You have a list too?”

 

“Naming Rachel started out as a joke but then it stuck but the guys give me hell for it all the time so I listed a few reasons it’s not so crazy. Most all of them do it too but for some reason they like to give me heartburn with my naming.”

 

Dina kissed him, keeping her nose touching his, “Am I gonna be competing with Rachel too.”

 

Danny turned Dina sideways on the couch, slid in close behind her where she could lean back on him,

 

“Nope, not at all.”

 

“There you go, now that’s what a girl likes to hear.”

 

Dina let him steal another kiss; he moved her hair to one side and kissed the back of her neck then he whispered,

 

“That why she’s locked in the trunk, she’s extremely jealous of you.”

 

Their playful scuffle slowed into something quieter. *

 

=16= Steeping Passions Mulling Hearts

 

     Dina found herself sitting on his lap once again, facing him while she caught her breath. The words in their conversation slowed somewhat but now they were saying things to each other that could only be heard with their hearts. Danny laced his fingers together behind her back letting them rest just above the swell of her butt.

 

     Dina had to touch his face as if she were memorizing it. She slowly brushed her hands through his thick hair, lightly playing with his ears and cheeks,

 

“Danny how old are you?” she pulled him close letting her lips glide across his forehead.

 

“Thirty-three, why”

 

      Dina kissed the worry lines at the edges of his eyes that were just starting to form and wondered what had marked him with these lines of pain. To her they made him even more handsome. His gentle spirit peeked out through his eyes and she pictured herself spending the rest of her life in his arms. No sooner had that thought filled her with joy and Danny kissed her deeply with all his passion as if he overheard those thoughts and wanted the same.

 

     He pulled his hands apart, wrapping his arms around her. One of his hands lay flat on her back letting him feel the pounding of her heart while the other guarded her waist. This Kiss had short bursts where they were force to pull away just long enough to breathe but to them it was one long glorious kiss. The passion in their panting scalded their skin driving then closer, to feed on the other one as if it were their only purpose in this life.

 

“Danny wait” she managed to form those two words in a split second. It took him another few seconds to bolster the will to stop for whatever reason she needed, he would stop in agony.

 

“Yes baby, I’ll, wai…stop” he rested his forehead on her chest with his mouth between her breasts. When his head cleared and he could breath in through his nose, the delicate sent of her made him dizzier.

 

     Before he could ask what she needed, Dina gasped, “My heart is going to explode if we don’t…for a second.”

 

     The fevered smile they shared let them both know they had to stop what they were doing so they wouldn’t ignite into flames themselves. Danny turned himself on the couch laying back with Dina on top of him. She slid off his chest and cuddled into his arms contented to stay that way the entire night if that’s as far as they went.

 

“Sweetie is this going to fast for you; should we stop?”

 

“No, I’ve never felt this way before, but I know this is what want…with only you.”

 

“Do you need something to drink?”

 

“No all I need is you.”

 

     Danny kissed her again and in one swift move, he stood scooping her into his arms. She knew where he was taking her but he stood there for a moment waiting for her to object. Dina kissed him then clung to him.

 

“Oh Danny wait we need that bag.”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

“There’s things in there we will be needing.”

 

Danny set her in the counter as if she were a sack of food brought home from the market. The cold cement in the garage made him move as fast as he could.

 

“Now where were we?”

 

     As he scooped her up that time, he pinched her butt before climbing the stairs. Dina hadn’t seen the upper floor yet because Danny felt if he showed her the bedroom, she might feel pressured into staying. Just as they got to the top of the stairs, she whispered,

 

“I need to use your bathroom.”

 

Danny walked into the master bedroom and whispered his secret back to her,

 

“It’s over there”

 

     When he set her feet on the floor, he chuckled at how fast she disappeared. He turned on a small lamp in the sitting area over near the window and took off his white shirt dropping it in the chair. Danny patiently anticipated Dina’s return as he looked out the window.

 

     As the door opened, he caught a quick flash of blue silk in the reflection of the glass before she turned out the light. Danny turned around in time to she Dina crawl onto his bed doing her best leopard impression daring him to join her.

 

     Her eyes widened when she saw the sculpted bulk of his chest and shoulders. The lampshade cast a dim golden glow on him and the heavy shadows increased the look of his thick muscles. Dina forgot trying to act sexy for him as she sat on her feet and placed her hands in her lap. She had seen well-toned men in magazines but the truth of it was this was the first time she had seen one in person, and Danny still had secrets she hadn’t discovered yet. *

 

 

* The Secrets in her melody (part III)

 

=17= A Night Forever to Remember

 

      Danny slowly walked toward the bed. She could see in his eyes that he was already making love to her in his mind. Dina’s imagination flash forward in time just far enough to picture him taking her the way she always dreamed he would. When he stopped at the edge of the bed, she crawled over to meet him. Rising up on her knees, she let her hands glide across his chest, exploring.

 

     Danny’s hands slowly flowed over her shoulders and down her back, drawing her to him. Dina touched her lips to his chest, rolling her face on him, breathing in his essence. In her heart, she already gave herself to him and now he was finally about to take her body. Every time he moved, she could feel the power in his muscles yet he commanded them to remain gentle for her sake. Just being near him made her dizzy and now he would fill her with his love.

 

     Danny kept moving slowly forward, Dina wrapped her arms around his neck to keep from falling backward on his bed. His since of humor was not entirely subdued and he playfully growled like a hungry bear.

 

    When he reached the center of the bed, he crouched on his elbows so he wouldn’t crush her. Danny cradled her in his arms, drawing her to his loins. Dina was forced to wrap her legs around him. The hem of her gown slid up her naked legs, it was sinfully wicked to feel his trousers touching her delicate skin. Danny whispered, “Kiss me.”

 

     Those words set off a firestorm in her as she welcomed him into her mouth. Without any warning, she felt a tightening building inside her. This strange feeling filled her with an excitement she never knew. It took control of every muscle in her body as it flowed through her. She groaned in ecstasy, surrendering to this overwhelming joy. Nothing any of her friends ever told her could have prepared her for the soothing rapture that followed, every ounce of strength vanished from her. Danny pulled back from their kiss, holding her cheek next to his as he felt her relax.

 

     Dina put her hands up to touch his face as he lifted up to watch over her. She wanted to explain what he just did to her and how much she enjoyed it but her voice couldn’t find the words. Danny quickly pulled away from her for only a second and the voice inside her screamed for him to come back. When he did the warmth of his naked skin touched her where his slacks had been, this started another fire in her.

 

“I needed you now but we need to make sure you are ready.”

 

     What he did to her with his tongue made Dina loose her mind. No one had ever done that before, she swore on her life, no one but Danny would touch her again.

 

     Danny held her wrists as she thrashed about, him restraining her heightened the pleasures. At one point she thought she heard a woman scream only to realize it had been her.”

 

“Oh my god Danny, please stop, I can’t take it any more.”

 

   Dina would never forget the wink and the smile Danny gave her before he came up beside her, kissing her again. She felt as if she’d been riding a rollercoaster for hours. He slipped the thin straps from her shoulders, pushing her gown to her waist because she had other delights he wanted to enjoy. They were already puckered from the excitement she just discovered. Wrapping her arms around his head while he nursed on her gave her a thrill she won’t soon forget.

 

     Dina felt so nice from his attentions, she wanted to please him with the same intensity he had done for her only moments before but he stopped her,

 

“Maybe later sweetheart, but now there is something else I want.”

 

     He opened one of the packets she brought, her eyes flash wide when he adorned him self with the condom. Never had she imagined a physique quite like his, no kind of exercise could have given him that.

    Danny lifted himself above her again as her heart violently thrashed in her chest. Her imagination already felt the pressure in her. She had never known such girth.

 

     Once again, Danny surprised her with his gentleness. Their eyes held to each other as he made them one. Her mouth opened as she drew in a deep breath, his probing kiss joined her as well, and this was the final missing piece. Now she truly belonged to him, heart mind and soul. Danny lifted himself high above her, her fingers lightly clawed at his chest as he massaged her with his slow moving.

 

     Quickly they found a pleasure in the other one they would always remember. He touched parts of her never before discovered. This sealed her heart to his love. He picked up his pace; she started promising him anything as long as he didn’t stop making love to her. Dina even surprised herself with some of the things she swore. The entire time he never took his eyes from hers, his soothing voice urged her on, to let go

 

“Yes baby, you feel so nice….no I won’t stop….not until you say…..stay with me darling.”

 

     Finally, Danny waited as long as he could; he gripped the sheets with a power that was almost frightening. Dina marveled at what he was doing to her and what was happening to him. This beautiful man was loosing control because of her and the way they were joined.

 

     All of a sudden, while in the throws of heavenly passion Dina felt something different. At first, she couldn’t quite tell what it was until his release, then she felt a delicious burning that came deep inside her and it came in waves. At that very moment, her pleasures erupted in her again; she realized the condom had broken. Adding to her confusion, she was elated by this accident.

 

     When Danny regained some of his self-control, the sorrowful look in his eyes told her he too realized what had happened. Before he could withdraw, Dina locked her legs around him, driven with wanton lust. Her words came out almost like a demand, then melted into a plea,

 

“NO Danny, don’t leave me…..its too late, please just stay there.”

 

     Danny smiled, “Yes baby” petting her hair out of her eyes, kissing her everywhere. Dina started to cry but they weren’t the tears of sadness. He finally broke the tension by whispering,

 

“I don’t think we’ll ever forget this night my love.”

 

=18= Visiting Dreams of this and That

 

     Danny’s voice soothed Dina while his gentle hands played with her most of the night. Just when she thought, he was exhausted; he grinned or nibbled somewhere else announcing another storm.

 

     Morning found them wrapped in the sheets with Danny pressed to her back. She didn’t have the strength or will to move. Dina closed her eyes again listening to him breathe, still feeling the tingles everywhere he had been, mewing quietly with the feelings he gave her for the first time in her life. For years, she read magazines touting claims of a special reward for women having sex with a good lover. Dina thought the writers of those articles overstated the joys a girl could receive until Danny showed her a whole new world.

 

“Morning sweetie, how’d you sleep?”

 

Dina purred, wiggling back into his heat, his arms crossed her chest,

 

“It was Wonderful”

 

Danny relaxed his arms so she could turn over then he asked,

 

“I don’t know about you baby-cakes, but I am starving. Once I get cleaned up, do you want to join me for breakfast? I cook a mean omelet.”

 

“I would love to taste your cooking; but I need to freshen up too.”

 

“Did you see my cool shower; if you want, we can share, there is plenty of room, I’ll try to leave you alone long enough for you to wash your hair, but beyond that I’m afraid I can’t guarantee my conduct?”

 

“I can tell you’re already getting ideas, but I’ll take my chances, don’t think for a minute you’re gonna be totally safe in there either sweetheart.”

 

     After one of the longest showers in history, they managed to get dressed in a set of his flannel pajamas. Dina wore the top while Danny wore the bottom but he purposely left the top three buttons undone on her shirt. They called their meal breakfast but it was more like an early lunch.

 

     All day they talked about their lives and what brought them to the path they were walking through life. Instead of just sitting around while they visited, Dina helped him clean. This kept them from feeling self-conscious while they divulged every little detail they normally wouldn’t want someone else to know.

 

      It felt liberating, being able tell Danny her deepest thoughts, finding out he felt the same way she did. They talked about Janie and Pixie, making plans to have them come with her in the future, once she filled them in on who Danny was to their mom.

 

     When Danny found out how old Janie was and how responsible she acted for her age he begged Dina to stay at least another night if not most of the weekend as well.

 

     After a few phone calls, Dina managed to arrange to stay until Sunday noon. That way, she could spend some time with her children when she got home; filling Janie in on the real reason, she came, and why she was staying. Janie already knew but hearing her mom admit she had a boyfriend was her price for watching over her little sister.

 

     Danny called on one of his employees, to act as general manager while he played hooky. He and Dina got dressed to go to the market deciding to swing over to Zell’s house, to pick up the rest of her things. Before they arrived at Zell’s, Dina called her when Danny stopped to buy them both more flowers. After she hung up, she smiled at Danny,

 

“Okay you asked for it, when we get there you better put up your guard because my big sister can be quite a handful.”

 

“I sure she can after what I saw yesterday. Her little sister turned out to be quite a handful too.”

 

“Danny you are a wicked man”

 

“Yes I am….and you love me for it, don’t you?”

 

Dina blinked a couple of times, she said the “L” word to herself but hearing Danny say it was so much sweeter,

 

“Yes I do love you for it.”

 

     Now Danny’s expression changed when Dina answered him. He got a little quieter and took her hand while he was driving. Dina slid closer and he kissed the hand he was squeezing, letting his lips linger while he thought.  *

 

=19= I Think You’re The Only One

 

     The words Dina just said out loud, burned in her ears as her memory let them echo.

‘Yes, I do love you for it.’ Danny had the radio on, when a song he liked came on, he turned it up a little more but to her it faded far away. Danny’s singing also moved away with all the other sounds around her. Everything went into slow motion.

 

   Every time Danny looked at her, she seemed to be gazing deeper into him past his beautiful eyes where his gentleness came from. When the echo returned again, some of the words remained, I do love you.

 

     Her entire life there lived two voices in her. They had always been at odds with one another. She came to know them as ‘Good Dina’ and Bad Dina. Following or ignoring their advice, had gotten her in trouble many times or played it so safe her and one of the voices were bored to tears.

 

     Never had these voices agreed until now and this startled her. ‘I love you.’ What are you saying?  She tried to argue with them, to hear the other side or all the ‘maybes and what if, but she could even think that way. It’s true I love him.

 

     Danny looked at her again and suddenly everything was as it should be once again.

 

“I asked it this was the turn baby-cakes.”

 

Dina quickly recognized where they were,

 

“Yes, this is it, two more miles.”

 

“Are you okay; I thought you were going to sing ‘Love me tender’ with me when it came on but you got quiet instead”

 

Dina smiled and took his hand, “That has to be one of the prettiest songs he ever sang.”

 

“Danny winked, “Don’t tell anyone but one of my favorite movies has got to be ‘Blue Hawaii’ us cellists aren’t suppose to like that kind of music but I can’t help it.”

 

“Keep going, you might as well tell me all your secrets, I’m going to find out eventually.”

 

Danny grinned and acted like he kissed her, “And how do you plan to do that?”

 

“Didn’t I tell you?”

 

“What?”

 

“You talk in your sleep.”

 

“I do not”

 

“Sure you do and I’m gonna remember everything.”

 

     Danny wasn’t sure whether to believe her of not but it would have to wait when they pulled into Zell’s driveway and saw her waiting for them.

 

“Oops, you’re in for it now, look at her hands on her hips. You might want to throw it into reverse and run while you can.”

 

     Dina could almost hear the crap Zell was going to lay on Danny when he got out of the car. This amused her to no end and she started snickering to herself. There was no way she was going to wait for him to open her door and miss the best part. When Danny turned off the car, Dina opened her door to step out. Instead of Zell going after Danny, she threw Dina a curve by snapping at her.

 

“And just where in hell have you been young lady? Do you know what time it is?”

 

     As soon as Zell looked at her sister, she stopped her playful attack in mid sentence, covering her mouth with both hands at the same time.

 

     When Danny came around the back of the car, Zell went to him and hugged him around the waist. She made sure not to take her eyes from Dina, while she questioned him,

 

“Oh you bad-man, what have you done to her?”

 

She didn’t wait for him to answer but patted him on the butt before she walked over to Dina,

 

“Look at her, that’s it, she’s toast, she’ll never be the same again. You little shit-head you’re glowing. Get your ass in the house, you two are grounded till you’re…. well, get in the house anyway.”

 

Zell wrapped her arm around her sister and reached back to take Danny’s hand as they walked inside.

 

     Danny closed the door, as he was the last one in. He handed Zell the small bouquet of flowers and kissed her cheek. Zell grabbed him by the shirt while he was still bent over, close to her ear,

 

“Let me guess you’re an only-child to aren’t you?”

 

“Yes”

 

“Just my luck” she stuck her tongue out at Dina before looking for her favorite vase.

 

     Dina sat on one of the bar stools at the corner of the breakfast nook. She liked the way Danny stood behind her with his arms around her locking his fingers. She leaned back to him massaging his hands with her fingertips.

 

“You guys don’t have to run off right away do you?”

 

Danny spoke up, “No, we have all the time in the world. What do you need?”

 

Zell laughed, “We won’t get into that, but how about a cup of tea?”

 

Zell lived alone and enjoyed their company. They talked for a while telling Danny stories that made Dina blush or pretend to be mad. Zell stepped out of the room for a moment to put away one of her photo albums. Dina was whispering to Danny between his kisses when Zell came back. She figured they were getting ready to leave then Dina said,

 

“Go on you ask her.”

 

Danny squared his shoulders, “Zell, would you please join us for dinner? It’s casual and I think the chef would probably go out of his way to surprise you.” *

 

=20= Heartstrings Attending to His Bow

 

     Dina’s eyes begged her sister to accept the dinner invitation. Zell had no plans to turn it down when she found out Danny was going to be the chef. She wanted to find out more about the man that had stolen Dina’s heart. Danny told them he wanted to go back to the farmers market and Zell insisted she drive over so they wouldn’t need to bring her home.

 

“Danny you go ahead, when we’re ready I’ll show Zell the way.”

 

“Dress comfortable, nothing fancy. You girls like Italian?”

 

Zell smirked, “Anything you want, as long as you’re doing the cooking.”

 

Danny made sure Dina remembered the way before he left. He was hardly out the door when Zell pounced on her sister,

 

“Okay, what’s he like, did he curl your toes, wait, that look on your face already told me he did but I want to hear about it.”

 

“Zell, you’ve lost your mind if you think I’m gonna tell you that.

 

“Come on, did he leave any marks on you?”

 

“No, Danny is kind and very gentle, he would never do that”

 

They headed to Zell’s room to see what was in her closet,

 

“That’s horse pooh and you know it, that smirk on your face tells me you got bite marks all over you.”

 

Dina’s ears turned as red as her cheeks, “Well maybe a couple…little ones”

 

“I knew it, don’t try lying to me, because….

 

“I know, because I suck at it right?”

 

“Well you do, ever since Mom told you a big red dot appeared on your forehead when you lied, hang it up. From that day on you couldn’t lie if your life depended on it.”

 

“And I suppose you can?”

 

“Sure watch this” Zell pulled her hair back so Dina could see her forehead, “I promise not to go to his house while you’re gone.”

 

“Dina shoved her sister in the closet and closed the door, “You ass, you’d better not, Danny is….he’s…I think I love him.” she needed to tell someone.

 

Zell’s muffled voice was a little more serious still holding to her sarcastic ways, “No shit, I could have told you that yesterday, now open the damn door.”

 

     Danny wanted them to show up in denims but Dina barrowed one of Zell’s smaller dresses, they spent a little time on their hair and makeup too.

 

“These day, any man that brings me flowers is gonna get the best I’ve got. Besides I’m the one that has to come home alone and I want to step it up a little…for a change.”

 

“But I thought you had someone, Steve wasn’t it?”

 

     Zell made it clear to Dina she didn’t want to talk about her love life or anyone named Steve.

 

     When they got to Danny’s house, Dina had to push Zell’s mouth closed and remind her to take off her shoes when they got inside.

 

     Danny was already home, cooking up a storm, by the time they went in Zell had almost melted when she saw the inside of his home. He proudly watched from the kitchen as Dina showed Zell around.

 

     A glass of wine was waiting for them when they came back. He pointed out some of the places he and his Dad had trouble fitting or building certain custom joints.

For the most part, that stuff went right over the two girl’s heads but Zell could tell most of his pride was for the time he spent with his father and not just the house. 

 

     After dinner, they visited a while longer and Danny agreed to play for them. Even though Dina and Zell were wearing dresses, they gladly sat on the floor in Danny’s music room to listen.

 

     Dina watched him closely as he drew his bow across the strings. Already convinced he was the most beautiful man that ever lived, when he took a hold of the cello, his spirits soared. Danny closed his eyes during some of the parts but when he opened them, he could only see Dina.

 

      Zell knew nothing of music but she knew love when she saw it or in this case heard it. Danny’s music was telling Dina how deeply he felt. Zell couldn’t decide which one of them to look at but it filled her with joy to see her sister happier than she had ever been. The way Danny pulled at the bow while looking at his love made Zell a little uncomfortable as if she were intruding on a very private and tender moment.

 

     When he finally stopped, Dina was glowing again. Zell wiped a tear from her own cheek before it embarrassed her and for the first time in her life, she didn’t have a smart-ass comment.

 

“I’m going home now so you two can be alone.” *

 

=21= Something Dear Should You Know?

 

They walked Zell out to her car, making her promise to at least send a text when she made it home. Dina swayed side to side in Danny’s arms as her sister drove away,

 

“You know you made her cry tonight with your music, and she never cries anymore.”

 

They waved once more when she got to the end of the driveway before walking hand in hand back inside. They cleaned the kitchen to its usual spotless status before retiring to the couch to snuggle by the fire.

     Dina lay across his lap playing with his fingers. Danny’s other arm cradled her head while he twisted his fingers around locks of her hair watching what she was doing. Dina noticed he was being a little quieter,

 

“What’s wrong Danny?”

 

His hand gesture and the sigh that came a moment later told Dina to be patient while he found the right words. This sparked her curiosity and concerned her a little too. She turned so she could look at him when he decided to come out with what he was thinking.

 

Danny started off slow as if he still wasn’t completely sure how to phrase his thoughts.

 

“Dina….I ah…theirs been things I’ve wanted to say…and I’m not sure if I should, I mean….”

 

“Is it a bad thing?”

 

“Well it might be depending on your reaction.”

 

Dina started to sit up but Danny wrapped his arms around her pulling her closer. His explanation wasn’t starting out as he hoped it would, so he seemed to approach it from a different angle,

 

“You once asked me why I never got married and I joked about them being scared off by my devotion to music but the truth is…. I never found someone that…. Felt….I mean…. You know how when you’re playing is flawless, the feeling you get when you know its right?”

 

“Yes?”

 

“It has never felt right except with you. I know it’s much too soon to be thinking this way but….”

 

    Dina relaxed when she realized part of what he was trying to tell her. She closed her eyes and gave herself permission to breathe again. She managed to crawl up onto his lap facing him, waiting for him to say the same thing she had been thinking. The reason she hadn’t said anything to him was she didn’t want to ruin what they had building between them. Now all she had to do was be quiet long enough for him to say what she had been thinking as well.

 

“So you see if I tell you things too soon it’s just, I mean I don’t want to scare you by…”

 

“Danny do you love me?”

 

“Yes baby, more than you know.”

 

She didn’t give him a chance to say another word, kissing him into silence. He still wasn’t sure she understood him. Taking her by the shoulders, he tore himself from her long enough to blurt out,

 

“Baby I want forever….with you.”

 

He waited for her to run when it sank in what he just told her but she didn’t move. Instead, Dina’s eyes moistened as she whispered,

 

“Me too.”

 

     He dropped his head to her chest, exhausted; his fears consumed all of his strength thinking the worst would happen. Danny clung to her listening to Dina explain what had been going through her mind too.

 

     From that moment on, making love to him was even sweeter. Hearing him tell her he loved her, pushed her over the edge time and time again as she marveled at the sound of his voice. Dina also knew when to profess her love for him, this pushed him beyond his limits of control but every time she said it, he only wanted her more.

 

     When their little four-night honeymoon was over, their bodies had been joyously abused by the other one in every conceivable manner known to lovers. When her train stopped at her station, she moved quite a bit slower than she did getting on a few days ago but pain and soreness never felt so wonderful to her.

 

     Dina called ahead to talk to her daughters so when they were waiting for her at the station it didn’t surprise her but she was happy to see them. A few days ago, Dina wasn’t looking forward to explaining herself to her oldest daughter. Although most of the details would not be a topic in their mother-daughter discussion, Dina wasn’t feeling guilty about it any more.

 

     Telling her little Pixie wasn’t going to be as easy as with Janie. Pixie was a daddy’s girl. Hearing the news that not only were mommy and daddy going to be splitting but mommy had a boyfriend too, might be a bit much for her to handle.

 

    Dina decided to hold off telling Pixie some of the things she would need to know, she would tell her eventually but now was not the time. *

 

=22= Homespun Discord Abated

 

“Okay Mom, you promised, what’s his name; what’s he like; is he cute?”

 

“Close the door first. His name is Danny, he is very handsome, he owns Nelson’s mu….”

 

“Wait, Daniel Nelson, as in Nelson Shipping?”

 

“No silly, as in Nelson’s music supplies. He owns a shop in Darshan. Danny plays the cello in the orchestra.”

 

“So how was it?”

 

“We had a wonderful time, he loves to cook, he cooked dinner for me and Zell…”

 

“Shit”

 

“Janie, you know better than that.”

 

“Aunt Zell called and wants you to call her as soon as you get home.”

 

“I’d better, before she starts worrying. Hey, keep this to yourself, not a word to Pixie, I’ll tell her, and watch your mouth.”

 

     Dina spent the rest of the day with her daughters, making sure they had clean clothes for school. The house wasn’t too bad so she had it fixed up in no time. As she was cleaning, she noticed Richard’s shaving gear was in her bathroom and his pillow was on her bed. He was either at Sherry’s or at one of the sports bars. She gathered all his things and put them back in the den as well as moved the rest of his suits to the coat-closet.

 

     Now he had no reason to bother her at all. She cooked him a meal and washed his clothes as per their deal. She even had time to strip the bed replacing the sheets before he got home. When Richard got there, she could tell right away he had been drinking by the foul odor that radiated from him. He didn’t want anything to eat but she left it on the table for him anyway as proof she upheld her end of the bargain.

 

     She steered him into the bathroom, and as soon as he came out she showed him the beer she had waiting for him. He followed her into the den and it didn’t take much to push him onto the couch. She knew if she could get him to sit down for five minutes, he wouldn’t bother her any more.

 

Dina went to tell the girls’ good night and Janie was waiting her,

 

“You know he’s getting worse, while you were gone he was cussing at you and talking to you like you were standing right there. Hell Pixie thinks he can do no wrong and she wanted to spend the night in bed with me last night.”

 

“Alright I’ll have to talk to him.”

 

Janie got a concerned look on her face, “Just stay out of his way Mom, don’t try to talk to him when he comes home, it’s too late by then.”

 

     Dina made sure the house was locked up for the night before she went into her room locking that door as well. Her mood seemed darker and it almost choked some of the good time she had with Danny. As she prepared for a hot bath, she noticed that her attitude toward Richard bordered on contempt instead of just being indifferent. She started to count all the things she hated about him but decided to stop when she noticed her teeth were clenched and her lips were white from being pressed together. Dina couldn’t help it but she even blamed him for her aggravation.

 

     The next morning after Richard and the girls’ were gone Dina almost ran to her piano. Practicing her parts for the concert made it easier to see Danny in her mind while she waited for him to call. Her fingers didn’t want to cooperate on the ivory at first but with a little concentration and a few hours, she smoothed out all the rough edges to her playing.

 

     When Danny did call, it became the bright part of her day and she took care of her housework while he was on the phone. She did everything except, vacuum the carpets while they talked. He even embarrassed her by getting a little frisky while she was at the market.

 

     By the time Thursday came, she almost ran to the train. She had a talk with Richard a few days before and he realized he was getting a little out of hand by coming home as drunk as he had been. All she had to do was tell him Pixie was starting to notice and that seemed to draw him back not wanting to disappoint his little girl.

 

     When it was time to get off the train she saw Danny waiting and her feet never touched the platform as she threw herself into his arms. He drove her to the concert hall and they stayed in his car so they could talk privately. As Danny opened his trunk to get his cello case, Dina playfully greeted Rachel and scolded her with mock jealousy reminding her that Danny was her man.

 

     They didn’t try to hide their affection for each other anymore as He took Dina by the hand leading her inside. *

 

=23= Presented With the Truth

 

Dina and Danny didn’t get a chance to talk again until everyone broke for lunch.

 

“Can you spend the night this time?”

 

“No, the girls are going to be home and Richard has been acting strange.”

 

“Is he hurting you and the girls?”

 

“No his drinking is taking a nose dive and I need to make sure….well I just need to spend time with Janie and Pixie. Oh, by the way, I told Janie about you and she wants to meet you.

 

“Could we invite them to come with you?”

 

“Not yet give me a chance to tell Pixie first, she still doesn’t know her dad and I are splitting.”

 

“That’s not going to be a fun talk is it?”

 

“No I’m not looking forward to it, she’s a daddy’s girl and I think it might be easier if Richard and I told her together. The problem is, I need Richard sober long enough to reason with him first.”

 

“I don’t envy you, how to you tell a little girl about life then push a break up in her face?”

 

“I wanted to try keeping it quiet until the school year ended so they would have the summer to get use to the idea but that’s not working out. I was going to ask Zell if the girls and I could visit her, not this weekend but the one after.  Maybe then, you and I could steal away for a few hours.”

 

Danny smiled and feigned insult, “So, I’m a booty-call now, huh?”

 

“Dina covered her mouth, “Oh that sounded bad didn’t it, I’m so sorry, I….”

 

“Wait-wait” Danny smirked as he hugged her, “No I was playing with you sweetie, I would love to get to spend some time with you. If we can’t slip away I understand, as long as I’m in the same room with you I’ll be happy.”

 

Danny let her relax before he quipped, “Yeah, by the time I get you alone again, I’ll have forgotten how to play nice….or even how to play at all for that matter.”

 

“You’re an evil man…and… I’m glad. If you forgot anything, we’ll just need to practice even more when we can. Besides, in seven or eight days I’ll probably be chasing you around the front yard if we’re not careful.”

 

“Now who’s being bad?”

 

     The rest of the day, they couldn’t talk to each other as the conductor went through several pieces repeatedly trying to get everyone perfect. After practice, Danny drove her to the station and surprised her by getting on the train with her.

 

“I figured out, I can ride with you to Freeman, then I gotta go back, this way we can be together for a while and I won’t miss the last train heading south.”

 

     Dina was thrilled, it had only been four days since they spent the weekend together but that was far too long to be with out him and his kisses. She showed Danny the earpiece she bought for her phone so she could talk to him while she did her chores. Danny thought that was a good idea and promised to get one as well.

    

He told her how much he missed her and his arms ached to hold her at night,

 

“Every night as I’m trying to sleep, I close my eyes and think of you. I need you tucked in beside me so I can rest, I just lay they there for hours wishing.”

 

     Dina knew exactly how he felt. She even tried to pretend, the stack of pillows behind her in bed was him, but it didn’t work.

 

    They decided, every night after they got into bed Dina would call him and they would at least get to say goodnight to each other.

 

     The next morning, Dina made sure she was up early enough to talk to Richard before he went to work. They agreed to tell Pixie about their situation on Saturday staying with them the rest of the weekend knowing as the news sank in; Pixie would have more questions for both her mom and dad. She could already see Pixie refusing to understand and going half-hysterical, hating them both for doing this.

 

     Pixie surprised her mom by handling the news as well as she did. She was upset but evidently, several kids in her classes had divorced parents, so it wasn’t as bad a shock as Dina thought it might be. When they reminded her she wouldn’t be giving up either parent but they may live in different houses, Pixie understood as best as she could.

 

      Dina coached Richard ahead of time not to mention his girlfriend and she didn’t tell him about Danny because the more guilt he felt; the easier it was to get him to cooperate. Besides, Danny was her secret and she wanted Pixie to tell her daddy, mommy has a boyfriend and watch him try and keep a straight face. She would also make sure Richard had to tell Pixie about his girlfriend first. There was no way she was going to set herself up to be the bad-guy in this.

 

At first, Dina thought about playing the wounded martyr but realized it would hurt Pixie more than it would bother Richard. She decided to be an adult and downplay it. This might make Pixie a little more susceptible to Danny’s charms when they met. *

 

=24=  Rain)-Check  the Date-(Night

 

    The following weekend Dina had to cancel their visit to her sister’s house because Pixie came down with a fever and stayed home from school on Friday. While Dina was looking for some medicine in her bathroom, she glanced over at the box of pads she kept in one of the lower shelves of the supply closet. Out of habit, she looked inside making a mental note when she would need to buy more. Something about it wasn’t right but she brushed it aside for the moment taking the medicine to Pixie.

 

     Danny had been disappointed with the news Dina and the girls weren’t going to Zell’s Friday evening because they all had plans to meet at the shopping mall Saturday. By meeting at the mall, he could talk to Janie and still blend in with the crowd if Pixie wasn’t ready to meet mommy’s boyfriend. He called back to cheer up Dina while she fixed soup for Pixie. Danny had fun giving his sweetie help with the recipe over the phone. She called Zell and their plans moved to the following weekend.

 

   About an hour before Janie got home from school, Dina decided to clean up and put Pixie’s medicine away. The sight of that little box of pads made her frown. Dina kept a calendar hanging in her kitchen so she went to double-check the dates.

 

      Dina always seemed to have a consistent cycle with her period and realized she was two days overdue. It was no cause for worry so she thought she found the silver lining in the fact she couldn’t see Danny this week because they wouldn’t be able to do anything anyway.

 

     She went about her work and checked on Pixie who was watching cartoons in the living room. Now every time she passed the calendar it bugged her that there was something wrong. By Sunday night when her cycle still hadn’t started, she began to worry. Once things got quiet late Sunday night, she went back to the calendar and counted backwards a little over two weeks.

 

“Five, six, seven…..November third, the first night Danny and I…”

 

Dina’s words caught in her throat. Her pulse was skyrocketing.

 

“Oh my gawd, I can’t be pregnant can I?”

 

     She pulled the calendar off the wall and took it into her room. Locking the door, she quickly flopped across her bed. She thought backwards a month confirming when her last cycle came and the one before that. From every angle she looked at it, she was pregnant, but she had to be sure.

 

I’ll go to the store and get one…no…two….I’ll get two of those tests; yeah that’s what I’ll do. I’ll even get two different kinds.

 

    Dina had her pillow over her head and almost didn’t hear her phone chirp. It was a text from Danny wondering why she hadn’t called yet. She tried to calm herself before making the call. She couldn’t say anything, not yet, and definitely not over the phone. She could hear that conversation in her head,

 

Yes, Hello sweetheart-stud-muffin, guess what darling-hot-blood, you’re gonna be a daddy, hello….hello?

 

     She could even see the spot on the floor where he passed out. Her phone chirped again, “I miss U.” Dialing his number, she decided she was working herself up for no reason and tomorrow she would buy the tests and straighten this out.

 

     Danny kept asking if everything was okay and she insisted she was just a little tired. Closing her eyes, Danny told her how beautiful she was and even sang a goofy song that was always playing on the TV right before they tried to sell you some perfume.

 

     The next morning, Dina walked with Janie and Pixie as they went to school and she went on to the market. She started to buy three tests in case she screwed one of those up but put it back at the last minute. Once she got out of the store, she opened one of the boxes to read and re-read the instructions on her way home.

 

Let’s see….okay….negative means….not pregnant, two lines means positive and I’m in deep shit. *

 

* The Secrets in her melody (part IV)

 

=25= Just lucky I guess

 

     Dina knew the pregnancy tests would be most accurate first thing in the morning. She waited until she heard Richard leave the house before she got the tests ready. She took both tests at the same time but refused to look at the results until her daughters left for school.

 

     Waving goodbye through the window she waited knowing Pixie had to wave a few more times expecting to see mommy standing there. It was killing her knowing the answer to her question was in her bathroom hiding under a paper towel. As soon as the girls were out of sight, she almost sprinted in to see the results.

 

     Dina’s reaction was mixed, on one hand she was glade she bought two tests and they both came out with the same results.  One of her fears had been one test would say yes while the other said no. That would put her right back on square one.

 

     She sat on the edge of the tub, propping her chin in the palm of her hand while she starred at the two plastic sticks. If she waited long enough, maybe the results would change. When they didn’t, she reread the instructions once more, comparing the drawings to what she had.

 

     Looking at herself in the mirror, she couldn’t help but compare the expression on her face to that of a child that didn’t get what they wanted for their birthday. Dina truly didn’t know whether to be happy or sad

 

     With her shoulders slumped, she slowly shuffled through the house and flopped on the bench in front of her piano. Leaning forward she let her forehead bump against the key cover with a thump. One by one, Dina sorted the answers she knew. Because of her beliefs she was definitely was going to be a mother again.

 

     Now the big question had to be what Danny was going to say about it. He told her he wanted forever but this was almost entrapment. What would that do to them, should she tell him quick or ease into it. If she found out how he felt about children that would let her know how the rest of her life was going to turn out.

 

“Let’s see….the boyfriend runs, my daughters hate me for having children with someone other than their father. Oh, we can’t forget a lecture from Zell every time she sees me, and Richard’s lawyers use this to give him everything. No one sends his or her kid to piano lessons from the divorced, pregnant harlot.”

 

Dina looked down at her flat stomach, “And you’ll grow up hating me for everything.”

 

     Now she wanted to cry. She opened her piano and started to play. Whom should she tell first? The music she played became the reaction of the person she told complete with dramatic wonderings of their questions, scolding and in her youngest daughter’s case, the crying too.

 

     Dina wondered how this would affect Janie, “You’re one hell of an example, say no to boys, and wait until you’re married. Oh and my favorite, good girls don’t do that.”

 

     She loved her daughter but she wasn’t ready to face the problems this might add to their relationship. She needed some adult advice, she needed her momma but this only added to her gloomy mood. It looked as if Zell was going to be her confidant but if she waited until Friday Zell might blow up right in front of the girls.

 

     Walking to her room, she sat on the edge of her bed dialing Zell’s number. Taking a deep breathe, she thought she would ease into the conversation.

 

“Hey it’s me, how’s your day going?”

 

“Well considering I just found out I need a new water heater and my plumber is a damn thief, I’d say all in all okay; how about you?”

 

“I wanted to ask your advice on some stuff; is this a bad time?”

 

“Yeah, no, I’m just waiting for the guy to come back with the new heater, and since when do you ever want my advice?”

 

Dina puckered her lips, silently exhaling a few breaths as if she were cooling soup before she dropped her bombshell,

 

“You like being crazy-aunt Zell to my kids don’t you?”

 

That statement made Zell pause for a moment, “Yeah, I don’t know if I like the crazy part but, what are you getting at? You girls don’t need to crash with me for a while do you?”

 

“No…..ah…. you remember how happy you were….ah, we were when Pixie was born?”

 

“Dang girl that was a long time ago, what brought this up?”

 

“How would you like to be happy like that….one more time?” *

 

=26= Reeling From New Beginnings

 

     Dina sat there with the phone in her hand listening, waiting for Zell to say anything, hoping it wouldn’t be too harsh.

 

“Are you still there?”

 

“Yeah, I’m just….ah wondering….whew….this is a surprise. You obviously wouldn’t be telling me if you weren’t sure so….what are you gonna do; or should I ask who’s baby is…I mean….Danny’s or Richard’s?”

 

     At first, Dina was upset Zell would even ask her that question since she knew Richard still lived in the house.

 

“It’s Danny’s I’m sure; there hasn’t been anything, well…. Richard and I haven’t…. in over a year.”

 

“What did Danny say when you told him?”

 

“I haven’t told him yet, I just found out this morning.”

 

Dina could hear a spark of joy coming from her sister then it changed to concern,

 

“Wait, you told me first; you must not know what you’re gonna do….”

 

They talked about it for close to an hour, Zell didn’t judge her as harshly as she thought, but then the conversation turned back to how Dina was going to break the news to Danny.

 

“You weren’t gonna tell him Thursday were you?”

 

“Well, not before practice anyway, but he needs to know soon.”

 

“I know, I’ll jump on the 3:15, you meet me at the station. Can you handle me as a room mate for a couple of days?”

 

     Dina almost cried, thankful her sister would go out of her way when she needed a friend. That night the house had an energy to it as Zell always got Pixie and Janie wound up. The four girls sat on the floor in the living room eating Chinese food around the coffee table. Dina quietly opted to stick with the steamed rice because the sweet and sour made her queasy. No one noticed but Zell.

 

     Zell could tell some outlandish stories, keeping everyone giggling until their sides hurt from laughing. Pixie was amazed when her aunt told her a tiger mauled her once. The look on the little girls face was priceless before she found out the tiger was only three weeks old at the time.

 

     During the evening with everyone teasing each other, Zell let it slip that Dina had a boyfriend. Pixie decided that was okay since her mommy and daddy weren’t going to live together any more. Even she could tell there had been something missing between her parents for a long time. When the news didn’t upset Janie and aunt Zell teased, the only thing that made Pixie mad was she wasn’t told sooner.

 

     Richard stumbled in about nine o’clock and as soon as he saw Zell, he disappeared into the den where he didn’t have to talk to her. Dina and Zell shared a room for many years while growing up so being roommates for a few days wasn’t going to be that big of an inconvenience.

 

     Not a word was spoken about why aunt Zell came to visit, but during the evening she would wink or take Dina’s hand to let her know she had a buddy. After Janie and Pixie headed off to bed, Zell and Dina shut themselves in Dina’s room to talk about the baby.

 

      Zell came up with the Idea Dina should go to orchestra practice on Thursday, go home with Danny then tell him. Something that important shouldn’t be rushed or revealed in public. After school on Friday Zell would take the girls to her house. They could all meet at the mall on Saturday if Danny hadn’t died from heart failure two nights before.

 

     Danny’s nightly text to Dina came through, telling her he loved her. This was the signal to call if she could. Zell excused herself so the two lovebirds could talk privately.

 

“Danny after practice, do you have any plans?”

 

“Before or after I kidnap you; are you going to come home with me?”

 

“I want to if that’s okay?”

 

“Oh sweetie yes, I miss you, now I’ll never get to sleep tonight.”

 

     Once she let him know there was something she wanted to talk to him about, his curiosity peaked. She managed to sidetrack his questions by telling him both of her daughters wanted to meet him at the mall if he was up for it.

 

“Now you got me nervous, what if they don’t like me?”

 

“Don’t say that they’re gonna love you, just be yourself.”

 

“That’s easy for you to say you’re not the one being sized up.”

 

     Hearing his voice always made her feel all warm and gushy. For a moment, she even forgot what she was going to be telling him. When she remembered, it made her shiver. *

 

=27= Don’t You Dare Touch Me

 

   Having Zell there for a visit let Dina rest a little deeper that night. The next morning seemed to arrive quickly and Dina swatted her sister on the butt as she jumped out of bed.

She didn’t realize how early it was. Richard still hadn’t left for work. She started making breakfast for everyone and coffee. Richard stood at the sink drinking a cup acting as if nothing had been amiss between him and Dina.

After checking his watch, Richard tried to kiss Dina but she pulled away.

“What are you doing?”

“I thought I would say goodbye before I left for work.”

“Okay goodbye, but you don’t kiss me any more, that’s what you have Sherry for.”

“Well that won’t be happening any more, I thought we might try to work things out between you and me.”

Dina stepped back as he tried it again. She moved her arm before he could touch it, “Why, did she dump you?”

     Richard scowled then changed the subject but the look on his face let her know she was right. She didn’t want to start an argument with him but his ignoring her for over a year while Sherry held all his attentions was not going to be forgotten with one morning kiss. As far as Dina was concerned, they were already divorced just waiting for the paperwork to finalize.

“The only reason you’re still in the house is to give the appearance to our children they have a normal life with two parents at home. In a few months Janie’s gonna graduate, then you and I are going to make another adjustment. So don’t try touching me ever again.”

Richard set his cup on the table and even though he kept his voice down, she could hear his frustration.

“Look, I made a mistake, I know that now, but we can fix this.”

“I don’t want to fix this….you threw me away, now that she found other things to do, you aren’t gonna just pick up where you left off. You can’t pretend everything is fine….I won’t….everything is not fine….hasn’t been for a long time, and will never be again.”

They heard the girls getting up so Richard lowered his voice,

“When I get off tonight why don’t I take you out and…”

“You’re not listening; go patch things up with her….but you already showed me how important I was to you. Even after I found out about you two, did it stop….No. When the school year is over, you’re moving out.”

Richard’s jaw muscles flexed and his eyes turned cold, “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Then I will….me and the girls will stay with my sister until we can find our own place.”

“You aren’t taking Pixie anywhere, she’s mine as much as she’s yours.”

“Richard listen to yourself, what about Janie, have you forgotten about her?”

“That’s different.”

“No, no different, I’m not going to argue with you on this.”

     Zell walked into the kitchen and both Dina and Richard stopped talking. His long stare at Dina let her know he wanted to say something more, but he looked at his watch again,

“I’m late.”

     On his way out, he didn’t even bother closing the door. The cool air quickly filled the room before Dina could get to it. Zell poured herself a cup of coffee,

“What was that all about?”

     Dina shut her eyes, putting a hand up, asking her sister to wait. After the girls went to school, they could talk without little ears around to overhear her contempt for their father. Dina put on her pleasant mommy-face until the girls waved to her while on their way to school.

“Richards’s attitude always made it clear he didn’t want me for a wife. Now that things aren’t working between him and that woman, Sherry….now he wants to make nice? Oh, and now he says he’s not moving out either.”

     Zell handed her sister another cup of coffee as she pointed her into the living room. Dina sat on the couch facing Zell to continue. Just before she took a sip of the brew, she set it on the table pushing it away.

“I can’t drink this, I have a baby to worry about. Richard touching me made my skin crawl.”

“What?”

“Here I am with Danny’s baby growing in me and out of the blue Richard wants a kiss. This baby may have been an accident but I made myself a promise that night that no one but Danny will ever touch me again.”
   
“Now this is what I wanted to hear, I’d rather talk about that stud of yours  any day.”

Playfully Dina shook her finger. “We’re not gonna talk about Danny like that, you nasty old woman.”

Zell’s giddiness about Danny instantly put Dina in a better mood as she walked back to the kitchen for a glass of juice. Zell talked a little louder until she got back,

“That man must have worked you over something fierce?”

“Let me put it to you this way. He is everything Richard is not and a hundred times better too. That’s all you’re gonna hear.” *

 

=28= Out of the Mouths of Babes

 

     Dina and Zell went window-shopping. Neither of them had an agenda or anything they needed to buy, but getting out of the house eased Dina’s mind. The sisters had always enjoyed seeing what the manikins in the stores were wearing. Wishing they could afford the lavish gowns or beautiful shoes. This had become a game over the years. When they found an outfit they both liked, they had to tell the other one where they would go while wearing it.

 

     That game came to a screeching halt when they passed a maternity shop. It had been thirteen years since Dina wore those fashions. The styles were brighter and more in tune with what other women wore these days. Walking into the store brought back a flood of memories. Everywhere they turned pregnant women waddled around searching for just the right dress or pantsuit.

 

     Dina quickly got lost in the infant section and it took Zell an hour to drag her out. They spent most of the day enjoying the sights and sounds of people bustling around but managed to make it home before Janie and Pixie got out of school.

 

     Richard pulled into the driveway early. The moment Dina heard his car door close her mood darkened. He set his briefcase beside the coat rack before walking into the kitchen. Everyone but Pixie noticed he wasn’t drunk. Janie left the room before he said anything and Zell turned her attention back to the tossed salad she had been preparing.

 

     Dina wasn’t use to seeing him so early but decided to be pleasant.

 

“Will you be joining us for dinner tonight?”

 

“I thought you and I were supposed to be going out for dinner?”

 

Dina pressed her lips into a tight line; Looking at him then glanced at their youngest daughter then back to him.

 

“No you must be mistaken, I remember you made that suggestion but I told you, I had other plans.”

 

Richard started to say what he thought but with Pixie and Zell in the room, he paused.

 

“May I speak to you in the other room?”

 

     Dina picked up one of the hand towels and followed him into the den. He waited until she walked past him and he closed the doors. Both of them knew that room wasn’t sound proof so they kept their voices quiet. Dina could feel trouble in the air and wanted to quell a fight before it got started.

 

“I don’t want to have this conversation now, not with the kids in the house and not in front of Zell.”

 

The couch divided the room in half and Dina used it and the coffee table to keep her distance from him. Every time he moved forward, she pulled back so he rested his hands on the back of the couch.

 

“Why won’t you talk to me?”

 

“Don’t go there, and don’t act wounded either. You didn’t have a word to say to me for over a year, not even the time of day if I asked. So now that it’s convenient for you I’m supposed to pretend everything is fine?”

 

     Dina hadn’t had a chance to tell him how she felt because most nights he wouldn’t be able to understand what she said from being drunk. Now that he stood there with a clear head, she wasn’t going to pass up this opportunity so she continued.

 

“And it hasn’t been just this year, how many other Sherry’s has there been over the last fifteen years? I kept my mouth shut and looked the other way for the last time. Our girls are old enough to handle the fact their parents don’t get along and they’re old enough to see what you’re doing. That’s right, Janie knows about this last one of yours and Richard…..the truth…the truth is, you’re never gonna change.

     I haven’t even gotten leftovers from you. Bar rooms, the bourbon, and sports got the rest. Now I want a life, my life with happy dreams and someone to talk to that wants me not just a maid.  So let’s talk about fixing this, I’ve already started, I filed for divorce. All I want is for you to take care of our daughters’ education and health care until they’re out on there own.

     Under the circumstances, I would say this has been a very productive meeting. If you have anything to add, please, be my guest. If not, then dinner will be ready in thirty minutes.”

 

    Dina walked past him and slid the doors open to leave. She could see Zell leaning against the kitchen counter wondering why it had been so quiet in the den. Pixie had her back to the doors so she didn’t know her parents were coming out.

 

“Are they in there fighting?”

 

Zell looked at Dina and then at Richard, even though he had his back to the open doors she knew he could hear. “No dear, they’re not fighting.”

 

“Is this about Daddy being drunk all the time or Mommy’s new boyfriend?”

 

     Dina cringed because she knew Richard heard what Pixie said. Without looking back, Dina walked into the kitchen but she could feel Richard’s hard stare on the back of her head. A moment later, she heard the front door slam as he left. *

 

=29= Awaiting the Final Straw

 

     Around the table, there was a different feeling as Dina and Zell both sat in silence. Janie looked from her mother to her aunt.

 

“What’s wrong with you two, and where did Dad go?”

 

     Dina looked at Zell, and her face was pasty white. Years ago, they had witnessed Richard loose his temper with a man he thought was stealing from their garage. The police ended up arresting Richard too for beating the man even after he was unconscious. Dina reached over touching the back of Janie’s hand but asked Pixie if she had any homework. Janie realized her mom and aunt Zell didn’t want to say anything in front of Pixie. After Pixie was through eating, she went in her room.

 

As soon as they heard her door close, Zell acted as if she had barely been able to hold back. 

 

“We got troubles girl, did you see his face?”

 

Dina pushed her plate to the side. “No, but I can imagine.”

 

Janie still didn’t know what happened since she was in her room and only came out when she heard the door slam. “Would one of you please tell me what’s going on?”

 

Dina stared at the table for a moment. “Your father was trying to patch things up between us. Then I told him no and I filed for divorce.”

 

“But I thought he knew that?”

 

“We had talked about it but he didn’t think I was serious, and then he heard Pixie ask about Danny.”

 

“That wasn’t so bad was it; he doesn’t know who Danny is.”

 

“But Pixie asked Zell if we were fighting about my boyfriend.”

 

“Oh, shit, and what did you say.”

 

“I didn’t say anything but I don’t think the worst is over yet when finds out….”

 

Dina stopped herself from saying anything more.

 

“Come on mom your scaring me, what else, if he’s gonna blow up hearing about Danny, then don’t tell him anything else.”

 

Zell spoke up. “This is something that everyone’s gonna know sooner or later, she won’t have to tell him.”

 

Dina understood her sister was urging her to tell Janie the rest of her secret.

 

“Janie your father has a terrible temper and….I just found out….I’m pregnant….its not his baby either….as mad as he got hearing about Danny, what do you think he’ll do when he hears this…..He’ll know it isn’t his.”

 

    Janie sat there with her mouth agape as it sank in what her mother had just told her. Slowly a smile came to her as she squeezed her mom’s hand, feeling privileged to be included in such an important secret. Janie knew there was nothing she could say to change the facts so she tried to lighten her mother’s mood.

 

“You naughty girl, didn’t I tell you to buy protection? What’s wrong with you kids of today, don’t you know there are serious problems you can get into.”

 

    Dina could tell Janie was joking but the pressure of the situation was getting to her and she started to tear up. Janie got up and went to her side. Dina hugged her daughter and cried.

 

     Thursday morning came and Dina felt even sicker than she had all week still not knowing a graceful way to tell Danny about the baby. On her way to the train, she called him. Danny’s deep voice always made her feel better.

 

“Hi baby-doll how’s my girl?”

 

“I need a hug, you got any of those?”

 

“Oh-yeah, hundreds of em, just for you. I’ve been antsy all week thinking about you and the girls. I haven’t ever hung around kids so I don’t know what to do. I just hope they like me enough they don’t run off before I can figure out how to play with them. Don’t suppose seventeen year old girls play any more but I bought them a surprise, it’s at my house.”

 

“Danny you can’t be spending your money on my girls, what did you get?”

 

“Nope I’m not telling, if I told you that would ruin half the surprise, but I was hoping we could get together Friday night. I don’t think I can wait to meet them until Saturday. Would you let me cook for everyone, Zell too”

 

“Before you meet the girls I have to tell you something.”

 

“Did you get me a surprise too?”

 

Dina was thankful he couldn’t see her face but her reaction was to cover it anyway.

 

“Ahh…well….I didn’t buy it but I….you will be surprised, I’m sure of it that.” *

 

=30= Falling in Love Hurts

 

     Dina’s cell phone didn’t work very well while she rode the train; she used that time to think about what she was going to tell Danny. She knew him well enough to know he would want to be part of the baby’s life but to what degree she was still unsure. Its one thing to say, I want to learn about children and another to be faced with the facts your girlfriend is pregnant.

 

     She realized it took her a while to get a grip on this and he had no idea what was coming. Dina didn’t expect him to hug her, drop to one knee professing his undying love and magically produce a ring from his pocket either. This was going to be a shock and he may need time to think.

 

     Enjoying the dream of his fairytale reaction was fun too so she let her thoughts wonder. It would be nice if her divorce from Richard were finalized before the baby was born but it didn’t look as though there was any chance of that happening either. She could picture herself walking into court hiding a watermelon under her shirt and Richards lawyers telling whose baby it was right before the judge gave him everything. She could even picture them forcing her to sew a big red letter to her dress letting everyone know her shame.

 

     With a shutter, she wiped those thoughts away before the train had a chance to come to a full stop. Looking out one of the windows, she saw Danny waiting. She felt as if she were being deceitful by choosing not to tell him about the baby until after they got to his house.

 

     On top of all that, she didn’t get much time to practice on her piano, knowing the maestro would hear it in her playing.

 

     Most of the time Dina felt electrified with anticipation until Danny kissed her. This time it was more a relief to be in his arms.

 

“My sweet angel, I’ve missed you.”

 

     Hearing his voice melted all her stress, holding his hand made her feel loved. She couldn’t think of anywhere she’d rather be than with her beautiful Danny. Dina knew she acted like a lovesick teenager, saying his name gave her arms goose flesh.

 

     He closed her door after helping her inside his car. It thrilled her to be treated like a lady. To show her appreciation for this simple act, Dina reached across unlocking his door. She swooned at the way he carried himself as he walked around to his side of the car.

 

     Most men, having his physique would be boastful or swagger as though they wanted to fight. Danny carried himself like a true gentleman. She marveled at the way he always dressed too. You would have thought he had his own personal valet. Even on a day of casual practice, Danny looked as though he walked off the pages of a men’s magazine.

 

“How’s my baby?”

 

“I’m sorry, what?” Dina almost choked before she figured out what he meant. “Oh, I’m good….better now that I’m with you.”

 

“What did you think I said darlin?”

 

“I don’t know I must still be on the train or something.”

 

Danny kissed her and tried to do his Elvis impression, “Well sexy momma, you ready to make sweet music?”

 

She never took her eyes off him, touching his hair and the back of his neck while he drove the short distance to the concert hall.

 

With a dreamy tone to her voice Dina said, “I wish I didn’t have to share you with all those people today.”

 

“Mmm, Caveman like the sound of that.”

 

Playfully she pointed her finger at him. “Don’t say that, you are not the caveman type”

 

Danny laughed, “I guess you’ll change your mind after awhile, but I’ll do my best to hide that side of me a bit longer if you like.”

 

 

     Being with Danny always made her smile. Everyone that knew him liked him. Dina blushed with pride seeing the jealous looks she got from the other girls as they got out of his car.

 

     By walking in the side door, they made it to Danny’s seat near the front of the stage first. Dina had to walk on a bit farther to her piano. Glancing back, she enjoyed his coy leering at her butt, so she silently retorted by moistening her lips and blocking his view with her satchel as if she tucked if behind her so she wouldn’t bump it into the music stands as she passed.

 

     The lights down in the auditorium weren’t as bright as they were on stage. Above the noises and bustle of people getting settled, Dina heard a commotion out there. Looking for who was yelling at everyone, she recognized Richard. He was drunk and pushing at anyone that got in his way. It didn’t take him long to locate the piano and stumbled to the stairway that would bring him up behind her.

 

     By the way, he cursed, she could tell he was blitzed and mad-as-hell. There was no way she was going to just sit there at her piano and wait for him to slice through the curtain. Her instinct was to run to Danny who was still getting his cello out of its case.

 

     Danny never met Richard but he stood up to find out who that asshole was that was causing a ruckus. He saw the terror in Dina’s eyes, the way she ran for safety told him he was about to meet the worst part of her husband. Richard might have been drunk but his anger enabled him to move fairly quickly. He grabbed Dina by the arm a split-second before she reached Danny.

 

    When he ran into Danny, he stopped as though he hit a wall. Richard still had a hold of Dina as he spouted. “S-my wife, I’n takin her home, NOW”

 

     By yanking her back, Dina spun around violently as she instantly changed directions. Richard lost his grip on her arm and she flew off the front of the stage into the orchestra pit, slamming into the chairs that hadn’t been brought up for practice.

 

     Danny shoved Richard out of his way as he vaulted into the pit. Dina wasn’t moving and there was blood everywhere.*

 

=31= A Little Unexpected Resolve

 

As soon as Danny knelt beside Dina, he heard her groan. There was a gash on her head and he quickly covered it with his hand to slow the bleeding.

 

“Dina can you hear me? I gotta get you to a hospital, does your neck hurt?”

 

“No”

 

“Okay, put you hand on your head here and push, oh crap, better use the other hand, I’m pretty sure you broke your arm too.”

 

     Danny didn’t waste any time waiting for an ambulance. He scooped her up and carried her to his car. Several people pushed small towels at them as he rushed past them.

 

“Can you keep pressure on that while I drive?”

 

“Yes, damn this hurts.”

 

“I want you to talk to me the whole way, no passing out is that understood.”

 

“You know you’re bossy when you get excited.”

 

“Yeah that’s that caveman part I was tellin you about.”

 

“Look at my arm.”

 

“Just lay it across your chest, we’re almost there, and stop trying to move your fingers.”

 

     She cracked jokes to calm him while he drove. With one hand on the wheel, he made sure she kept pressure on the cut. Dina could feel his hand trembling from the adrenaline.

 

“Oh, by the way, in case you were wondering, that was Richard.”

 

      Danny growled under his breathe and Dina tried to smile knowing Danny was quite perturbed over this whole situation.

 

     When the nurses at the emergency room saw all the blood on both Dina and Danny, they rushed out to help immediately. The doctor cleaned Dina’s cut with betadine, to Danny’s amazement instead of sutures, the doctor glued the gash closed. Now that her bleeding was under control, the doctor looked at her arm.

 

“Well young lady, it appears to be broken. Before I set it straight, I need a few pictures so I know what I’m dealing with.”

 

Dina cringed, “You mean X-rays?”

 

“Of course, is this gong to be a problem? You’re not pregnant or have a pacemaker do you?”

 

Dina looked up at Danny while he held her hand.

 

“Yes I’m pregnant, about three weeks but you would call it five.”

 

“Congratulations to you both, and we’ll find some other way to check that arm. I’ll have a nurse help you with a gown then I’ll make sure that fall didn’t upset your baby.”

 

Danny blinked a few times as if waking from a trance. “Will she be able to go home?”

 

“Since her pupils responded evenly, I don’t see why she can’t but she’s gonna have one hell of a headache along with that arm. I’ll see what I can do about that too with out bothering the little tyke.”

 

     The Doctor closed the curtain on his way out. Dina was almost afraid to look at Danny. This wasn’t how she planned to let him know about the baby but then again, nothing was going her way.

 

“Danny I swear I wasn’t keeping this from you, I wanted to tell you in person. I was going to tell you tonight once we were alone.”

 

     Danny never let go of her hand but came around where he could look her in the eye. With loving care, he brushed the hair away from her face then kissed the tip of her nose. Staying so close, even though his whisper was the quietest she had ever heard.

 

“You’re gonna have a you and me baby?”

 

Dina bit her bottom lip and nodded. Her eyebrows crinkled with worry still not knowing how he was taking the news. Even though she answered him clearly, he asked again.

 

“I mean…. A little us, kind of real baby. One that calls me Daddy and I get to….we get to….hang out and build stuff.”

 

Dina kept nodding but the more he talked the bigger her nervous smile got. “Yes that kind of baby”

“Wow”

 

     He kissed her again. He stood up straight and walked to the foot of the bed. Both his hands went to his head as if that would help him fathom the full gravity of her news. Dina’s heart raced. He might be changing his mind for the worse. When he turned around his devilish smile let her sigh with a little relief.

 

“Does this mean I get to keep Momma too?

 

She nodded and Danny came back around for another kiss to seal the deal. Off to the side they caught some movement by the doorway. The doctor was smiling at them.

 

“Let me guess, you didn’t know about the baby and you two aren’t married.”

 

Danny puffed his chest. “Not yet doc but soon, very soon.”

 

“Well step out of my way and let me patch this little girl up so you can take her home.”

 

     By the time they got her released, it was almost one o’clock in the afternoon. They weren’t going to go back to the auditorium but Danny had to get their things. A police car was parked near the side entrance so Danny wanted her to stay in his car.

 

“No I’d better go in too, if nothing else but to show off my cast.”

 

“You realize the only thing you’re gonna be playing for a while is Chopsticks and Mary had a little lamb.”

 

“Oh you’re real funny, just for that I’m going to pester you while I watch you try to get all the blood stains out of your car.

 

     The police officer was happy to see them and said they saved him a trip to the hospital. Richard had already been taken to jail charged with drunk and disorderly behavior. He also had a dozen assault and battery charges with domestic violence.

That meant he was going to be held without bond.

 

“Now we gotta call Zell and tell her what happened.” *

 

=32= Veiled Truths Laid Bare

 

     Dina made Zell promise to keep quiet about how she broke her arm. Her children were going to have enough changes forced on them. By the time she got off the phone, Danny had his cello and her satchel loaded, he wanted to take her home right away. All evening he fussed over her. Dina sat at his table watching him cook. Danny bubbled with excitement. The way he was talking, Dina was going to hide his wallet when he meet her daughters at the mall.

 

     Danny was going to buy stereos, game systems, and all the clothes they wanted. He was already planning ballet lessons or soccer practice, bicycles and skateboards. He almost burned the noodles in the wok when he couldn’t decide if he wished for a girl or a little boy.

 

      Dina propped her elbow on the table and rested her chin on her hand watching him gush. All her fears of how he may react faded. Her heart felt full and content. Life was exciting with Danny. As she sat smiling, her head throbbed but the discomfort paled, eclipsed by the joy that bubbled in her as well. Her thoughts wondered a little, but everything about him was perfect. He loved her and she knew her girls would love him too.

 

     Danny had been working near the sink, talking up a storm when he stopped and spun on his heels,

 

“We gotta come up with names, we don’t know if we need girl names or boy names.”

 

     Danny would hardly let her feed herself; he cut all her food and refilled her glass, and even used her napkin for her. Finally, Dina managed to get her fork from him and used it to put food in his mouth so he would be quiet for one minute.

 

“Sweetie listen, we have nine months to come up with a name, it doesn’t need to be done tonight. Karate lessons and ballet will just have to wait a few years. Now while I have your attention, you need to think about something else.”

 

Danny still had food in his mouth because it was hard to chew with the big grin on his face as he gazed into her eyes. “What”

 

“You’re getting a ready-made family, a wife, two teenagers and a baby. We can’t keep spending money like you’re planning, we’ll be broke in less than a year.”

 

     The smile disappeared from his face and she felt bad about bringing him down. He looked at his plate for a moment then grimaced. “I lied”

 

She didn’t understand what he meant but knew he was about to confess something that shamed him greatly.

 

“Remember when I told you about my girlfriends not wanting to compete with my music?”

 

“Yes?”

 

“Well that’s not quite the truth.”

 

Dina’s heart almost stopped.

 

“Promise me you’ll hear me out, and I swear I will never lie to you again.”

 

For the first time since she met him, she wasn’t sure she wanted to hear what he was going to say.

 

“Danny whatever it is….it happened before us, it doesn’t matter as long as were together. Okay?….Just….say it’s not going to affect you and me. I promise I’ll be a good wife.”

 

     Dina’s heart was wrenching and she was getting sick to her stomach. Putting her fingers over his mouth was her last effort to beg him to consider not to tell her anything more. “I love you Danny what ever it is I don’t care.”

 

     He set their plates on the coffee table and gently took her into his arms. She nestled in as close as she could, kissing him so he would stay quiet but he continued.

 

“The truth is I ran from them.”

 

She had her eyes closed with her face buried in the folds of his shirt. When she heard what he said she sat up a little, where she could look him in the eye.

 

“First of all, I need to tell you, I do own the music store like I said, and I give lessons between customers.” He paused again. “And the reason I ran from them years ago and the reason I can’t handle money is because I hate it so.”

 

She interrupted. “That’s fine I can pinch a penny pretty well, I’ll help with the bills by giving piano lessons. We’ll make it you’ll see.”

 

“No, you don’t understand, I lied to you about my money too. I am the only child in my family. My mother is an only child and my father is an only child. I come from two very rich families.”

 

Dina remembered what Janie said when she heard Danny’s name. “Nelson Shipping?”

 

“That’s me, well, that’s Dad but I told him I didn’t want to do that the rest of my life. I wanted music. He let me have my dream, to do what I wanted with my life. The problem is, like it or not he has no one to leave the company to but me.”

 

Dina just sat there while Danny played with her hair.

 

“This brings me to my final lie. I read a book a long time ago where a king disguised himself as a pauper to find out what people really thought of him.

     Those women didn’t love me they loved my money. I have been searching for you, someone that loves me. Now that I’ve found you don’t judge me because of this lie. All I wanted was love…..your love.

 

=33= A promise of Tomorrow

 

     Dina felt more loved than she thought possible as she listened to Danny talk of the future. The sparkle in his eyes, his hypnotic voice, everything about him filled her with joy. Sitting on his lap, kissing him while his lips explored her secrets swept away her worries, melting her heart. She placed her legs on either side of him sliding forward while he carried on.

 

     She ran her hand through his hair, playing with wayward locks, trailing the tips of her fingers along the outline of his jaw; every detail was tucked safely into her memories. She caressed the sculpting of his neck as her hand glided farther down. Slowly, single handedly, she worked the buttons of his shirt loose; allowing her fingers the freedom to wonder over his chest muscles, touching his bare skin stirred her emotions further. A reflection of her feelings claimed her lips as a slight grin. Looking into his eyes, it grew into a wanton smile.

 

Danny couldn’t ignore it any longer. “What’s on your mind babe?”

 

She shook her head, not willing to tell him what she was thinking but he insisted.

 

“Come on, you gotta tell me, we have to tell each other everything.”

 

“Oh we do huh, who made that rule?”

 

“I did just now.”

 

Dina retorted. “But I don’t play by the rules.”

 

Danny closed his shirt and held onto the wrist of her right hand being careful not to bump the cast on her left arm.

 

“How about we make a deal then.”

 

“What kind of deal. This isn’t fair; I can only use one hand to defend myself.”

 

“You don’t play by the rules and I don’t play fair. That sounds like a good tradeoff.”

 

Dina gritted her teeth as she playfully tried to pull out of his grasp. When she found it was useless to struggle, she decided to play on his sympathies.

 

“That hurts”

 

     Danny released her immediately, ashamed for being too rough. She leaned forward and kissed his cheek then whispered. “I win”

 

     That did it; Danny didn’t bother holding her arms. He went straight for her butt with both hands and squeezed. Holding on tightly he stood and walked to the stairs.

“Where we going?”

 

“I’m taking you upstairs to drown you.”

 

“No you’re not.”

 

“Wanna bet?”

 

     He didn’t put her down until they were in his master bathe. He promptly stripped her of her clothes. With a smile on her face, she didn’t say a word but managed to distract him a few times, as he ran the water in the bathtub. Danny’s tub was large enough for three people so it was going to take a few minutes to fill.

 

     He gently helped her in and rested her cast on a towel he placed on the tile edge, covering it with a second towel so it wouldn’t get splashed.

 

“You never did tell me what you were thinking earlier.”

 

    As he waited for her to answer, he stripped out of his clothes and joined her in the tub. She flicked a little water on him as he eased into what she called ‘the upstairs pool’

 

“I just love to hear you talk, most of the time it’s quiet at my house except for Janie’s music.”

 

Danny poured some bubble bath into the water after he turned off the faucet.

 

“Aren’t you supposed to put that in while the water is running?”

 

“Watch this.”

 

He pushed a button on the wall and air jets churned the warm water. Mounds of soap bubbles quickly piled up.

 

“Pretty cool huh?”

 

     Danny used a plastic bowl to wash her hair then lovingly washed her everywhere else. He played with her and the cloth as they talked. Every now and then, he would stop in the middle of a sentence and interject.

 

“Guess what, I’m gonna be a daddy.”

 

“Danny you can’t tell anyone for a while.”

 

“Why not?”

 

     Dina had to explain there was any number of things that could go wrong in the first trimester. It had become a custom to remain quiet until that time passed. Danny was disappointed he had to keep it a secret but as he massaged her feet, he struck a bargain with her.

 

“Oh, you gotta let me tell my Dad….and Mom. They probably gave up on grandchildren by now.”

 

“Okay but nobody else.”

 

“That’s fair; you got to tell two so I’ll tell two.”

 

He got a surprised look on his face.

 

“I suppose I’d better tell them about you first. When are we getting married?”

 

“Baby I’m not even divorced from Richard yet.”

 

He growled when she mentioned Richard. “That reminds me; let me have the family lawyers help you with that.”

 

     He told her they would get her what ever she wanted but for Pixie’s sake, she insisted they play fair. Danny helped her out of the tub, softly drying her with several towels. She wore one of his t-shirts to bed.

 

     Try as he might, he couldn’t keep his hands to himself but Dina was just as bad. At some point during the night, they finally drifted to sleep with Danny holding her.

 

     The next morning she gently woke to the beautiful sounds of Danny’s cello. A relaxing shiver washed over her as she listened to him. Even with the door to his music room closed, the muffled tones of his music were plain enough to enjoy. The thought of waking every morning to the sounds of angels filled her with joy. She was drawn to it as though it had magic powers.

 

     She couldn’t bring herself to disturbing him so with a smile; she slid her butt down the wall, sitting on the floor. Dina had seen the intensity in his face when he allowed the music to take him. Her imagination made the wall between them transparent as she watched him play with such fiery passion. *

 

 

* The Secrets in her melody (part V)

 

 

=34= Working out Key Details

 

Dina enjoyed listening to Danny play but all too soon, it stopped. She stood and knocked on the door as she opened it just so she wouldn’t startle him. He gave her a good morning kiss. Bending down to put his cello back in the case, he looked up at her.

 

“I want to stay home with you but I have two lessons today and it’s not fair to them to cancel.”

 

Dina walked over to the large window, looking out at the small garden the cold winter nights all but destroyed.

 

“I agree, may I tag along, I’ve only been to your shop once.”

 

“I would love for you to come if you don’t think it would be a bore.”

 

“How about I follow you around today as your shadow just so I can see you’re day to day?”

 

     Danny was delighted she wanted to be with him and dared her to keep up with his pace. His next stop was the basement. He built a weight room complete with running machines, rowing machines and a few she didn’t recognize. Dina stayed out of his way as he used practically every one of them. Once he got on the treadmill, she walked around in front of him where she could wink and blow kisses at him while he sweated.

 

    The sheen that covered his muscles captivated her as he ran in just shorts. From his vantage point, he leered at her as his feet thumped against the scrolling matt. Dina teased him by slowly lifting the long shirttail that covered her naked thighs. His smile grew as the drumming on the matt sped up.

 

     Dina’s heart beat faster as she watched. She breathed in the scent of this powerful man and marveled at the speed he kept. Finally, he glanced at his watch and tapped a few buttons on the machine to slow his pace.

 

“We gotta leave here in forty-five minutes; you might want to get ready.”

 

     Dina knew it would take her longer to get dressed with her cast so she didn’t waste any time. Danny bound up the stair right behind her and jumped in the shower.  He managed to dry off, get dressed and take his cello out to the car before she finished getting cleaned up. He came back to the room just in time to zip up her dress. He helped her with her hair but she was on her own when it came to applying her makeup.

 

     At his shop, he introduced Dina to Peggy. He couldn’t remember how many years she had been his bookkeeper but she quickly reminded him. A few customers came in so Danny left the two women in the office. He went to welcome his guests as he called them. Peggy had brought muffins and fixed coffee. She prepared Dina a cup as they chatted.

 

Peggy smiled, “He talks about you all the time. You have changed him.”

 

Now Peggy had Dina’s attention, “Oh, Tell me?”

 

“He has always been full of energy as you probably guessed by now but ever since he met you….the only way I can describe it is to say… he glows. All the years I have known him, I have never seen him this happy.”

 

     Dina enjoyed listening to stories of Danny, things he would never have told her because they were stories of his generosity and kindness. When one of his students came for her lesson, Peggy and Dina took over greeting the customers.

 

     Danny had converted one of the store window-displays into a small classroom. He told his students they needed to get use to people watching them play without being distracted. The door to the room dampened the music enough it didn’t interfere with business. In fact, it seemed to draw more people in. Dina’s knowledge of music made her the perfect sales clerk especially when it came to pianos and sheet music.

 

     The day seemed to have rushed past her and was over before she knew it.

 

“This was so much fun; normally my day drags on forever.”

 

     Danny sat next to her on one of the piano benches trying to strike the cords with his left hand as Dina tickled the ivory with her right hand.

 

“Heck, I may need to hire you.”

 

They thought they were having a private conversation but they heard Peggy speak up from her office.

 

“Please do, with her here I can get my work done too.”

 

At first, Dina thought he was joking until he asked again. Peggy stepped to the door of the office; the look on her face was begging Dina to say yes.

 

“I would love to but Janie needs to finish school where she is.”

 

“Okay, how about after, there’s a great collage here in Darshan. You’ll be closer to Zell and we can be together all the time.”

 

     Dina loved the idea. They had already talked about living together someday so that wasn’t going to be a big change. If Janie went to college in Darshan, Dina wouldn’t need to let go of her baby as soon as she thought she might. The following year Pixie could go to school there too.

 

“You have a deal but don’t expect me to call you boss.”

 

“I wouldn’t think of it but I get thirty percent of your lesson fees since I’m gonna supply the piano and loose my clerk while you teach.”

 

Instead of shaking hands on the deal, he kissed her. She had to get the last word.

 

“Do I get medical and dental coverage too?”

 

“You bet and lots of vacation time too.”

 

Peggy threw up her hands and walked back into her office, “I might as well move my desk out front by the register with you two around.” *

 

=35= Room to grow

 

     Danny and Dina said goodnight to Peggy then locked up the store for the weekend. When Dina called her sister, they found out her and the girls were already at Zell’s house. Dina talked to Janie to make sure both her daughters knew she broke her arm in a fall but she was okay. Dina didn’t want her girls to be shocked by the sight of a cast on momma when they saw her.

 

     Zell agreed to meet them at Danny’s house for dinner. After Dina hung up, she let Danny know what was going on.

 

“They are going to meet us at your place…”

 

Danny interrupted her, “You mean our place.”

 

She kissed his cheek and continued but with a sense of pride and belonging. Dina liked the way ‘our place’ sounded and added her touch to it.

 

“They will meet us at home” she paused and winked at him. “But we might have a small problem. Pixie doesn’t want to come.”

 

Danny’s smile faded a little as he concentrated on the road. He nodded as though he understood her reluctance. When they got home, they had time to change but Danny decided he should stay in his suit to meet the girls for the first time.

   Dina knew how much he hated wearing ties so she slipped the knot, removed it, and unbuttoned his collar before handing him his chef’s apron. She helped him roll his sleeves back a few turns by placing his hand on her chest while he tried to nibble on her ears.

 

     He realized he wasn’t going to be able to play with her as much during the evening, so before the girls arrived; he pestered her while she fixed drinks. Danny kept a close eye on what she put in her glass.

 

     Dina met them at the door as Danny watched from the open kitchen. He didn’t want to overwhelm them by hovering too close. Zell came over and kissed him as he handed her a glass of wine. Janie’s eyes lit up as soon as she saw him. She made sure her mother blocked Danny’s view of her then quietly said, “Damn Mom, where did you find him?”

 

     All the introductions were made and Pixie scowled at Danny and kept her distance. She climbed onto one of the bar stools where she could watch what he was doing but crossed her arms. Dina took Janie and Zell through the house showing them what a beautiful place it was. They were on their way back to the living room when Dina overheard Pixie talking to Danny.

 

“You might be my Mom’s boyfriend but you’re not my Daddy.”

 

Danny glanced past Pixie knowing Zell and Janie heard it too. Dina wanted to step forward and defend Danny but a subtle gesture with his fingers begged her to wait.

 

“Sweetie, I would never try to take your Daddy’s place.”

 

“Good”

 

“But don’t you have several friends?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“And I suppose you have one friend that is special, a best friend maybe.”

 

“Amanda She is my best-est friend”

 

Danny leaned on the counter where his eyes were on the same level as Pixie’s but far enough away she didn’t feel pressured.

 

“Does Amanda know you have other friends even if she is your best?”

 

“Sure she does.”

 

“Then what if we say I’m just one more of your friends, not your daddy and not as good a friend as Amanda but still a friend. Would that be okay with you?”

 

     Pixie twisted the corner of her mouth as if she was mulling it over and un-crossed her arms leaning on the counter as he was.

 

“I guess it would be okay.”

 

Danny stuck out his hand, “In that case. Hi I’m Danny, your newest friend.”

 

     They shook hands as if they made a deal. Danny winked at the other ladies and they came back into the room. Now that Pixie had established boundaries in her mind, she relaxed a little more. The house soon filled with five conversations going on all at the same time.

 

     Danny’s kitchen and dinning table seemed to be the focal point in the house with guests. He tried to include Pixie into some of the conversation but he could tell she was getting bored. After refreshing Zell’s drink and getting more juice for Dina and Janie, he took the phone handset off the wall and handed it to Pixie. Then he whispered, “Go call Amanda,” pointing to one of the back rooms.

 

A little while later, she brought it back, whispering, “Thank you.”

 

  Danny quickly figured out little girls enjoyed having secrets so he used it to his advantage.

 

“If one of those rooms was going to be where you stayed if you came to visit me some time, which one would you choose?”

 

Pixie ran off to look while everyone else talked around the table. She came back in a few minutes, still whispering, “The one on the left.”

 

     Neither one of them was doing a very good job keeping what they said to themselves but it was a fun game. Danny told her she could have that room as long as she decorated it the way she wanted including paint and furnishings. She ran back to look at it again.

 

     Dina raised her eyebrows, “She doesn’t know how to paint and you have no clue what you are starting.”

 

Smugly Danny winked, “I guess we’ll both learn then.” Turning to Janie he added, “I guess the room on the right is yours with the same deal if you want it.”

 

Janie thanked him and mocked her mothers warning with an evil laugh before she went to check out her new room.

 

Zell pouted, “What about me, there’s one more back there.”

 

Dina patted her hand, “Sorry dear, that’s Danny’s music room.”

 

Danny corrected her, “No, not anymore, that’s the nursery.” *

 

=36= Stir-fried Stories Broiling Heat

 

Danny was having the time of his life. The stories the girls told let him glimpse into their past. Pixie went to watch TV not enjoying how grown ups liked to visit. As usual, Zell kept them in stitches with her funny stories of her and Dina when they were younger. Danny and Janie liked listening to them bicker like little girls over details both of them remembered differently.

 

     The women decided they would clean up in the kitchen since Danny cooked for them. He tried to help but they wouldn’t have any of it. Dina couldn’t wash or dry so she put things away. Danny walked back to visit with Pixie but soon returned with the news she had fallen asleep.

 

     Danny had never been around so many women each with strong opinions and playful dispositions. Being an only child, it amused him to watch how sisters competed for the last word. Janie rolled her eyes to let him know this was how they acted all the time.

 

     Even with all the excitement and chatter, Dina found herself resting in his arms quite a few times throughout the evening. Janie nudged Zell to make sure she saw how gentle Danny was with her Mom and it brought approving smiles and a few winks.

 

     Danny made sure to keep Dina’s kisses to a minimum not wanting to upset Janie but the grin she held, let them know he was being overly cautious. Finally, Janie spoke up to her aunt.

 

“Why don’t we go get Pixie and head back to your place so they can be alone for a while?” 

 

Zell nodded but had to sound contrary. “I think we ought to stay and pester them all night.”

 

Danny’s ears turned red from the teasing they focused on him. He helped bundle Pixie up and guided her to the car when it was time. Pixie started chattering about what they would do at the mall tomorrow, and Danny challenged her to a duel in the arcade.

 

     Dina stood beside Danny as they waved goodnight. From the angle the girls saw them standing there, it appeared as if Dina had her arm around his waist. She slipped her hand down the back of his pants pestering him until it was almost impossible to keep a straight face. A half a second before the car was out of sight, Dina ran for the door to make her escape from his retaliation.

 

     Danny tried to catch up on all the kisses he missed while they laid in bed playing. They waited for the phone call to let Dina know the girls made it safely to Zell’s place.

 

     When the phone rang the caller ID showed Janie was calling from her cell phone. Danny stopped tickling Dina long enough for her to answer the call. After saying hello, Dina heard Janie screaming hysterically on the other end.

 

“He’s here, Zell’s hurt, I think he got a gun, what do I do, oh gawd he took Pixie inside, help me.”

 

     Janie was screaming so loud Danny could hear her and the shocked look on Dina’s face horrified him as they both scrambled to get dressed. They carried most of their clothes as they jumped into Danny’s car. He drove with the skill of a racecar driver and just as fast. Dina was clearly panicking. She was trying to keep Janie calm, finding out what was going on and relating as much as she could to Danny.

 

     Danny drove on the brink of insanity. He pieced together several facts on the fly. Richard had been released from jail and broke into Zell’s house. As soon as they opened the front door, he hit Zell in the head with something, grabbed Pixie and went back inside slamming the door.

 

     Danny handed Dina his cell phone so she could call the police without hanging up on Janie. He didn’t dare take his eyes off the road knowing things happened much too fast to risk dialing at the speed he was driving.

 

      As luck would have it, the roads were clear and Danny had to ignore Dina’s pleas to go faster. He feared the ice might cause him to loose control when he turned. His headlights flashed on Janie kneeling beside Zell’s car. The look on her face tore at him but he knew a clear head would be his best weapon. The fact that Richard might have a gun, and he didn’t even have a stick forced his mind to flash on anything he could think of to shut this tragedy down.

 

     Danny held onto Dina’s coat so she wouldn’t immediately run into the house before he could throw the car in park. She jerked out of his grasp exiting her side of the car but he was able to intercept her as she came around the back.

 

     Danny snatched her off her feet to stop her as she clawed at the air trying to fight her way in to find her baby. *

 

=37= No Time To Think

 

     Pushing Dina to the ground behind Zell’s car, Danny’s mind flashed trying to think of what he could do to get Pixie out of the house. Dina was still struggling to get up but he kept her pinned to the ground. Glancing up at every window he could see, not one light was on in the house.

 

     Danny tried to think like Richard, what did he want? Why didn’t he take Pixie and drive away when he had the chance? Why was he still here? What would he do with the gun? Didn’t he realize Janie would call as soon as he grabbed Pixie?

 

     Just as Danny realized Richard was waiting for Dina to arrive before he made his next move, Dina drew in a deep breathe to scream for Pixie. Danny quickly covered her mouth.

 

“Shut up, don’t you dare make a sound.”

 

     Dina’s eyes went wild. He knew she thought he was a horrible person. What she thought of him wasn’t important at that moment. Danny knew he didn’t have much time, Dina would scream out the moment he moved his hand.

 

“Listen to me, he’s waiting for you to get here. Don’t let him know, that’s what he wants.”

 

The look in her eyes melted from anger to tears and terror as she nodded. Danny looked at Janie.

 

“Give me your phone, wait, dial Zell’s number but don’t connect it. I may need to distract him with a call.”

 

     Janie quickly did what he asked, while he looked at all the windows again. Only one window had the blinds open. Richard would want to see out, he would want to see what was coming. Danny instructed them to stay down and wait for the police. He slipped around to the back.

 

     He vaulted over the fence into the back yard. No lights on the back of the house either. As his eyes got use to the dark, he saw the sliding glass door to Zell’s living room was shattered. He had never been a soldier but he watched plenty of movies. The good guy always won by using his head but he was scared out of his mind, this wasn’t the movies and no one would yell ‘cut’ and let him do it again if it went wrong.

 

      Pressing his back to the wall Danny tried to hear anything to let him know where Richard was. His heart beat so hard and fast he felt as if it were shoving him off the wall with every pulse. He heard Richard’s voice at the other end of the house. Knowing he was in one of the back bedrooms, Danny slipped in through the broken door. The tiny pieces of glass were muffled into the carpet when he stepped on them.

 

     Zell was lying on the floor in the foyer . Quietly he checked to see if she was still alive. Feeling a pulse encouraged him but he knew she was going to need help too.

 

    Danny unlocked the front door in case the cops wanted to come in, they wouldn’t be barricaded out. He couldn’t risk opening it and pushing Zell outside so he left her there.  He franticly looked for anything he could use as a weapon. No fireplace meant no poker, no umbrella stand, not even a baseball bat. If he opened the drawers to look for a knife, Richard might hear him. All he saw were pictures of family all over her walls.

 

     Danny took the wool scarf off Zell and one of the pictures off the wall. Flipping the picture over, he bent the tabs, popping the contents out the back. Wrapping the scarf around his hand several times, Danny picked up the pane of glass. Now he had a knife of sorts.

 

     Following Richards voice, Danny snuck down the hall toward the open door. Stepping into one of the other rooms he could listen to Pixie and Richard talking. Richard was trying to calm her, she sounded as if she had cried as much as she was going to, now she was just scared.

 

     Before Danny could think of anything to do, the flashing lights of the police cars shone in through the windows. The quick strobe of red and blue seemed to agitate Richard. The one thing the lights did in Danny’s favor, showed Richard held the revolver in his right hand. Just as Danny took a step farther into the side room, Richard ran to the front door to make sure it was locked. Danny grabbed the wooden chair that was under the desk and slid it into the hall.

 

     Danny’s heart raced knowing Richard would be running back in another second. If he didn’t trip over the chair, he would know someone was in the house with him. Every muscle in Danny’s body tensed as he heard him running back down the hall.

 

     Richard kicked the chair, it flew forward a few inches and wedged crosswise in the doorjamb. This knocked him off his stride when he tripped over the chair a second time, it took both his feet out from under him. Richard’s instinct to catch himself forced his hands open and the gun flew somewhere into the shadows.

 

     Danny pounced as if he were a lion. Even before Danny’s knees hit Richard in the back, he focused on his right hand to make sure the gun was gone. Danny already had the pane of glass cocked back as his only weapon. Another flash from the lights of the police car showed Richards fingers splayed out on the floor. Danny slammed the glass down and Richard screamed in pain.

 

     Danny kicked him in the head twice and grabbed Pixie as if she were a sack of potatoes. He had to stop long enough to unlock the front door again and pushed Pixie out into the light. Danny scooped up Zell and ran outside. Three cops met him half way out the door.

 

“He’s in the back room, and there is a gun in there somewhere.” *

 

=38= The Sum of Ever and Again

 

     The police decided to take their own sweet time trying to sort out what happened. Danny took one look at Janie and knew she was about to come unglued with that cop in her face. The ambulance loaded Zell on board; Danny stepped between the officer and Janie.

 

“Sweetie I need you to ride with your Aunt Zell, I’m going to stay here with your mom and Pixie then we’ll meet you at the hospital.”

 

Janie smiled and nodded as Danny helped her into the ambulance, closing the door.

 

“Sir I wasn’t through with that witness.”

 

“Yes you were, now go get your watch commander, so we can wrap this up. We need to get to the hospital.”

 

     Dina held Pixie in the back seat of Danny’s car while two cops openly discussed Richard right in front of the little girl. Danny closed the door interrupting them as well. The police lieutenant and two patrolmen marched straight for Danny. He took control of the conversation before they had a chance.

 

“That man is currently out on bond with a dozen assault charges, and a spousal abuse charge. You will add assault with a deadly weapon, at least four attempted murder charges. While you are at it, one count of breaking and entering, and for good measure, one count of kidnapping. This is my card; my lawyer’s number is on the back. We will be at the hospital for a few hours so if you have any further questions, someone can meet us there.”

 

The lieutenant started to say something but Danny pulled out his cell phone and poised his finger over the speed dial button.

 

“Sergeant, escort Mr. Nelson to the hospital.”

 

     They followed the officer to the hospital. Without taking his eyes off the road, Danny reached back over the seat to take Dina’s hand. They felt Pixie slip her hand in there too so he squeezed them both. To lighten the mood He asked Pixie if they could sleep late instead of going to the mall.

 

     Once they arrived at the emergency room, they found out because Zell lost consciousness, the doctor admitted her for a few days. Danny assured her the damage to her home would be cleaned and repaired before she was released.

 

     The sun was just about to rise by the time Danny took his ladies home. His bed was the only one large enough to sleep all three of the girls, so he closed the blinds and went back downstairs to give them some privacy. Dina slept in the middle with an arm around both of her daughters.

 

     Dina and the girls slept until after one o’clock in the afternoon. Janie got out of bed first. Danny’s room was nothing more than a loft that overlooked his living room. Janie walked to the railing and beckoned her Mom to join her. Dina looked down to see Danny still sitting on his couch asleep with his head slumped over to the side.

 

“Lets go easy on him girls, after last night he is probable ready to get rid of all of us.”

 

Dina led the way downstairs. Sitting in his lap, she pulled his head to a more comfortable position. Danny opened one eye. “No you’re not getting off that easy.”

 

She thought he was talking in his sleep. “What are you saying?”

 

“Nobody’s getting rid of anyone around her for a long time.” Danny closed his arms around Dina. “Why don’t we get cleaned up and go visit your sister for a while.”

 

Zell had to stay where she was for two more days before they let her go home. Danny talked Dina into letting the girls miss the last three days of school before they were excused for the holidays. He did his best to spoil each of them. Pixie decided she could have two best friends and Danny flaunted his favored status.

 

     Most all of the charges against Richard stood so he missed Janie’s graduation. Danny’s lawyers were able to push the divorce through even quicker with Richard in jail.

 

     A month later Danny and Dina were married. The honeymoon was briefly interrupted with the birth of Jonathan Brace Nelson. If the truth were known, even after all these years the honeymoon never really ended. Dina’s piano asks him about his love and Danny’s Cello reminds her of his gentle kisses.

END*